Thank You...

For Mike

 

Thank you

For sun filled days

Deep, laughing autumn eyes

Shivering tingles up my spine

Loving moments that seem to last for days

Forgiving the many things and

Kissing those times away

With my whole heart

Thank you

Author's Note

This is a rictameter poem. The syllable count is 2, 4, 6, 8, 10, 8, 6, 4, 2 for a total of 50.

Reviews

[Christopher Todd Dallas]

Love concrete/shape poems.
"autumn eyes" = excellent.
Line 5, although adhering to rictameter, scans forced. Sorry, I don't have any suggestions on how to fix it.

On line 9, your intent and signature is to end with the beginning but "thank(s)' is the grammatically correct modifier for a singular noun.
To achieve you signature, you must make a substitution line 8.
perhaps something like,
"Then my heart will"

[Coyote Poetry]

Poem is very beautiful. Kindness and love is in your words. A wise person knows to be thankful for the good things. A excellent poem.
Coyote

[Katie]

Beauty is the only way to describe this poem. Its so full of love and its amazingg!! Keep writting!

[Stacey Watts]

This was very beautiful. Truly work well done. Excellent job.

[Eternally Elemental]

AWwwwww!!!!

I only wish I have a partner one day with whom I can exchange poems like these :)

But then again my eye is set on a person who is a poet of motion (dance).
:D

Very enjoyable and has made me kind of hopeful hahah

[An owl on the moon]

The form and flow are wonderful, with a beautiful message woven in so flawlessly. Excellent, lifting write!

[Sean Allen]

And I thought it was a Psalm, perhaps it is both!

[Big ol' Kahuna]

Thank you
For starry nights
Your profound amber eyes
Toe clenching, breath taking moments
Love so rich to last more than a lifetime
Seeing past all my many flaws
Loving the hurt away
My whole heart, I
Love you

Nice job. I am loving it, and you.

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

What can I say, so sweet and precious... the beauty and simplicity of the piece make it the most sincere thoughts of love and admiration.