Breathe

Breathe

A Poem by Inkh(e)art
"

A poem about trusting people who don't really know what's best for you

"

“Breathe” he says, “just breathe”

So I gulp and swallow

Down

And

Down

Till I am filled and full


I sink below the sea

Upon a bed I’ve never known

Black

And

Black

The vision goes

 

“Breathe” he said, “just breathe”


© 2017 Inkh(e)art



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Reviews

This is fantastic! Dark, but not in the sense that makes one uneasy, just in the fact that it deals with death in a very natural and recognizable way--drowning! Good job!

Posted 3 Months Ago


Inkh(e)art

3 Months Ago

Thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoyed it
Wow!! This is profound, and full of angles of interpretation! "amongst a bed", however, doesn't make sense unless it's a bed of flowers or something of the like. It would make much better sense, and possibly contain much more power were it to be changed to "upon". Well done otherwise!

Posted 3 Months Ago


Inkh(e)art

3 Months Ago

Thank you! I meant bed in reference to a seabed. I appreciate the review :)
emipoemi

3 Months Ago

I'd still suggest putting "upon"....it would work better with the imagery and profundity or the poem.. read more
Inkh(e)art

3 Months Ago

Okay gotcha. I'll make an edit :)

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88 Views
2 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 1 Library
Added on June 23, 2017
Last Updated on June 24, 2017
Tags: sad, trust, breathe, poetry, drowning

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Inkh(e)art
Inkh(e)art

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