Solitary

she sits there
solitary, in a
concrete castle.
metal where you
rest your head,
bathroom at your feet.
no light of moon
no flowers or
trees, no ocean
breeze.

they say --
I cannot see you,
we don't have the same
mom but we are ohana.
you are my sister, until
my days are done.

after long conversations
they agree, & pretend
to believe the words
from my desperate lips.
they tell me remove your
shiny things, your
golden rings.

the boots --
they lead me, cold
authoritarian feet
I walk & walk ...
toward you.
contemplating
you turn and
I see your heart
in your eyes
because streams flow
out like mine.
and you reach
for my hands
between steel bars.

Author's Note

I should have added this note when I posted this writing. This writing is about a visit I made to see a loved one in an actual correctional facility back home in Hawaii.

Reviews

[barleygirl]

This is so strong & visual, even tho you're using a sparse amount of words to convey your message. I love that you describe the details of prison life by what's there, & also by showing what's NOT there. After all, it's what's MISSING from life that makes "Solitary" the punishment that it is.

[Island Hippy]

Mahalo barleygirl for your insightful words and your time

[Coyote Poetry]

I love this poem. Feel of the old Johnnie Cash songs and a Leonard Cohen song. You leave the reader with visions, something to think about and the feel of loneliness and sadness. Thank you Lizzy for sharing your amazing poetry.
Coyote

[Island Hippy]

So much mahalo for your time and words John! I feel humbled by the sincerity of your words. Your compliment here moves me and makes me smile.

[Coyote Poetry]

I love your work and you are welcome dear Izzy.

[Gaurangi]

I agree, you tell a story by a poem. It is amazing. Why don't you try spoken word poetry?
The beginning of the poem is very picturesque.

[Island Hippy]

Mahalo Gaurangi, I appreciate your kind comment.

[duff]

You have a talent for story telling and your choice of content is always a breath of fresh air. The title packs a punch and is spot on. Another great job Izzy.

[Island Hippy]

Mahalo duff that's very nice of you to say. I appreciate it.

[duff]

You bet. Anytime

[Dr. YumnaKay]

"I see your heart
in your eyes
because streams flow
out like mine.
and you reach
for my hands
between steel bars."

These lines had the most profound effect on me when I read this. This was melancholic for me in a way. Being there, caring for someone, that is the least we can do to show our love.
I feel silly pointing this out but.. "toward" should be "towards" I think..
Nicely penned, Izzy.

[Island Hippy]

Mahalo Yumna I really appreciate your time and lovely comment.

Toward is preferred in American English, but what I will always appreciate an eagle eye.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Hmm I didn't know that lol see I am silly haha 😛
You're welcome, Izzy. A pleasure always reading your works 😊

[Island Hippy]

No not silly at all :)

[Annette Pisano-Higley]

Powerful poem! "Concrete castle, Metal where you rest your head". Such stark and vivid imagery. Frightening, "the boots-they lead me". The body is imprisoned, but never the heart,"I see your heart in your eyes because streams flow out like mine." Amazing poem ohana!

[Island Hippy]

Aloha ohana, I really appreciate your words always so thoughtful. This writing is deeply personal to me, so mahalo much.

[Ken Simm.]

There are few pieces of art where the title is intricately linked with the piece as well as this. And visa versa. Not stark but intricate and pushing the numbness and hidden fragility one would feel in such a situation. Impressive and thoughtful.

[Island Hippy]

Aloha Ken, I appreciate your thoughtful comment and your time, mahalo. Izzy

[John Alexander McFadyen]

This is steeped in sadness and love as you describe the separation caused by incarceration using excellent metaphors. Lovely flow, excellent descriptive piece full of pathos.

[Island Hippy]

Mahalo for the lovely compliment John, I appreciate your time

[Lorry]

Some bonds never break, no matter what the distance. Nicely captured Izzy.

[Island Hippy]

Mahalo Nemo, 'ae that is very true

[richieb]

Aloha Izzy,
Very well written poem. Your words created an atmosphere of being alone in all the sense's of your life. Your poem created strong imagery in describing the ways and surroundings of prison life. Solid writing telling of family recognition and wanting to give support.
Thank you,
Richie b.

[Island Hippy]

Mahalo Richie, I deeply appreciate your words.