My Favorite Epileptic Seizure

Sometimes the truth really is stranger and funnier than fiction.

     Sometimes my seizures were memorable while others weren't. The one that sticks out in my mind right now happened the week after my brother came back from his honeymoon. He, his wife, and I lived in a split level house with a backyard that had room for a pool. This particular summer day, I decided to surprise my brother and his wife by painting the wooden deck that was set up near the pool. The day was a scorcher and I started to work very early, even before I took my medication. Bad idea. That's right, you can guess the rest, I was doomed to have a seizure. What I didn't expect was where I would have this fit. As I was putting the finishing touches of royal blue ink on top of the wooden deck I felt my spine tighten and my knees buckle. Down went the paint can and so did I. I fell down the steps followed by the half-empty can of Dutch Boy paint. When I regained some sence of normalcy I began cursing to the high heavens. I didn't hurt myself, no broken bones and not even a scratch - I was just covered, head to toe, in dark royal blue glistening paint. And these were the days before water-based paint, so I knew I would have problems getting the darn stuff of me. I thought I could clean myself up alone but it was a losing battle, I knew I needed help. The only person I could rely on was my brother who was around the corner with his wife at her mothers house.

Out came my new deige trench coat and my new snappy brimed hat. I covered as much of myself as I could, cause I didn't want any of the neighbors to call the cops.

       The short distance to the house felt like the longest walk of my life. Thoughts like:"What am I gonna' say?" and " I hope they know it's me" ran though my royal blue covered head.

But I needn't have worried, my brother had spotted me through one of the front windows as I was approaching the front door. He called out to his wife and his mother-in-law, "C'mere quick, there'a a Surf at the front door."

     All of them laughed until they were red in the face. Thinking back on it, I probably laughed with them, and this made me feel like just a regular guy.