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Awake

Awake

A Poem by JayG
"

Because a very special lady isn't with me...but should be.

"

Awake



I woke, enveloped within the comfort only your warmth can bring
My head was nestled into the curve of your shoulder, my hand on velvet skin, stroking.

But you weren’t there.

Memory brought the scent of woman: gentle, and softly sated with pleasure
So warm with sleep, so twined with hints of passions past:
An ambiance of morning…a residue of night…a reason for joy and tears

But you weren’t there.

I woke with you gathered tightly around my being, comforting and exciting, both at once.
I woke to memories and to desire, and to comfort, as my lips"of themselves"sought yours.

And then, you were there. But only for a moment:
In warmth
In passion
In comfort
In life
In all that matters.

But then, sadly, reality brought a sigh, and a turning inward
Because you weren’t there.

And on waking, I wept.


© 2017 JayG



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Reviews

Brought me to tears.. have been experiencing this exact feeling daily.. lovely work, thank you for writing this

Posted 5 Days Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Very good flow-- read many free verse poems, many came across as slightly choppy but each line you wrote flowed seamlessly into the next. That's one of the reasons why I really love the structure: like emotions, your lines fluctuated, and at a glance, it seemed chaotic; but there was a consistency within the chaos-- the repetition. It pulled together the irregular verses and gave flow. I also love how vivid the tone is... when I read it, I felt the frantic yearning, just a little out of control. Perfect. Then the realization gradually seeped in as the lines grew shorter and more numerous, until the cruel reality couldn't be ignored any longer. Finally ending the poem with a melancholy acquiescence, acceptance of the fact that it was a waking dream, no more...
This was beautiful, I'm glad I found this.

Posted 6 Days Ago


Very deep emotions, I liked the repitition of but you weren't there. I could feel the emotions you have expressed.

Posted 2 Weeks Ago


I absolutely loved it ! The memories , the loneliness..you captured it all so well :)

Posted 3 Weeks Ago


As someone who has recently lost someone they love, this hit home for me. I can relate deeply. The crave for human interaction and care comes from deep within and surrounds us everyday, this piece really dug deep with this idea.
Please, feel free to return the favour and give me feedback on my most recent piece.
Thank you.

Posted 1 Month Ago


It's almost like an animal that can't find food. It searches and searches for something so basic to its life but goes hungry.

There are basic human needs and when someone who fulfilled those needs isn't there, the whole body reacts like it's starving.

I can feel the sadness in this. More than sadness actually.

Posted 1 Month Ago


This is super sad. Those few moments between dream and awake are always the hardest time to deal with disappointment.

Posted 1 Month Ago


Monday Parker

1 Month Ago

Good job. This was a wonderful read. Thank you.
That moment when all Your senses are sensitively awake... that moment when Your spirit is raising high, touching through the rising the energy of that beloved Soul... being caressed in each fiber of Your being with such amount of that mysterious power, of that most divine warmth, no words to express it... only to be felt, as Your words are deeply felt within my heart, I would give anything to feel this again... and it's not only the death what might dragged these words, separation comes in some others forms too.

Posted 1 Month Ago


Hi jay great work from a master in poetry. I always find your reviews of others works educational and most informative ie concise. This was just excellent.

Posted 1 Month Ago


so so sad at times I think that I am alone with similar feelings , but many people around our world have loved and lost that dearest person/ friend etc
your beautiful poem with that haunting repetition is well done and profoundly painful... and written so well.

Posted 1 Month Ago



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Added on August 27, 2017
Last Updated on August 27, 2017

Author

JayG
JayG

Philadelphia, PA



About
    I'm old, fairly stupid, and I never did set women's hearts aflutter when I came into the room. To make matters worse, I'm a know-it-all. People often dislike me when we first m.. more..

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