Run to me

Listened to music on the plane home..this is what came

Even when the sea was calm

I could feel the storm

I could feel the storm coming

Even when the air was warm

I could feel the storm

and we both started running

But darling please run to me

Don´t run away

Don't let your footprints be wiped away by the waves

Darling run to me

Don´t run away

I´ve never been as scared as I am today

We have so many worries that we don´t need

Countless tears in the sea

If I lose you I´ll be out of my mind

So many dreams but we´ve been given so little time

Darling run to me

Don´t run away

Don´t leave me behind

Reviews

[Mayank]

Touching and the metaphysical elements you have used to describe the tensions in the relationship added bright star... good write.

[SleeplessVolcano]

Beautiful poetry.....however, sometimes we need to face the facts and consider that "running" may be a blessing in disguise.......

[Dr. Sojan Antony Veetti..]

touching poem...moving with sea wave, you could convey a deep feeling

[Glen Yumang Manese]

Your hook line with these two lines:

Darling run to me
Don´t run away

I hear the lyrical vibe...but if you work on this measure,,,and play with this a bit more...I'm sure the tone and feel would hit the reader better...I was lost in the letter "D" more so than the entire writing of this work...not to say its not worth a read...just needs an added feel...

[Johanna]

I´ll work on it some more :) thankyou so much :)

[Glen Yumang Manese]

you're welcome...let me know when you do...

[Ruth]

Holds tension and the fear of loss...beautifully tense and real :)

[R Smith]

That's great Johanna, it has the feel of a song lyric, I don't know if you intended that but put some music there and it could be a lovely song, its got style and passion, an element of fear mixed with a depth of love, well written, bravo :)

[Saddam]

A very nice read and great write dear.........

[Emily]

Vary nice wording!
Well done!!

[The Twin Arenas]

"If I lose you I'll be out of my mind" is a nice line.

[Avinash]

Beauty, love, tenderness and deep urge to love and get loved in return is all that could see in these
words.