Massacre @ Masada.

The knives are out as the Romans surround the Zealots at the Masada Fort.

(The View from the Masada Fortifications)

Massacre @ Masada


Imperial Tyrant, Consul Flavius Silva, leads the way from Zion
The bearers of Bull and Eagle, walk proudest in pelts of Lion.
Five thousand warriors strong, wearily march the 10th legion.
To quell the rebellious, rioting, rabble, of the Jewish region.

As the sweating Romans roast, on sun baked Judean plain.
Eleazar the Zealot, contemplates the destiny of the slain.
Standing on natures rocky mountain fortress, so sky high.
Will Elohim, heavenly bless the many, that will surely die.

Fresh salty scent of Dead Sea, sweeps along the dusty vale.
Picked up on the wind, along with cries of a deathly wail.
The ten Sicarii knifes drawn, massacre their own blood.
  The crimson tide of Martyrs, turns into a apocalyptic flood.

No escape to freedom or the forever shame of defection.
Just devout faith in the afterlife, their divine resurrection.
 No slaves or possessions, for Rome's grand empirical glory.
 Hopelessness and tribulation is the tragedy of this story.

The Romans surprised by the terrible solitude of the fort.
Attacked under a unnerving silence, as fire had caught.
Battering ram broke, bursting through defences ahead.
 No pleasure or joy they found, their enemies ALL DEAD!

They wondered at the true courage of their fanatical foe.
The immovable contempt of death, the lamentable woe.
960 soul's sacrificed to a desperate, terrible suicidal end.
Testimony to freedom's cry voice, forever will they send.




 

Reviews

[Becca Bishop]

Ugh. It's very hard for me to not hate you right now. YOU'VE KILLED MY MOOD, DUDE!!! How can I be all happy and peppy and "OH MY GOSH I LOVE THIS!!!!!" when I'm so jealous that I'll never be able to write as well as you can! GAHHHH!!!!!

Ok, I got most of my anger out but I'm still going to have to go menace some stuffed animals or something. But before I do that....

This poem instantly reminded me of the History of Greece and Rome class I took last year. The teacher would've loved this!!!! You've somehow managed to fit a whole lesson into a spectacular poem that rhymes no less! Amazing! I can only imagine how hard it must've been to get all these ideas and names to coexist in the same place. WHEW!!! But you pulled it off superbly. Wow.....

And you closed it perfectly too. So often I read poems that just...end. You know? It seems like something's missing, like the writer just got fed up and ended the poem so they could move on to something else. Super annoying when people don't finish their thoughts and just leave them there. It's like the except me to do more WORK and finish the poem myself!!! Can you believe it????

Great job with this one!!! Why do I even say this? It's like repeating myself over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again whenever I read something of yours. I should change it up a bit...

THIS WAS THE GREATEST!!!! THE COW SAYS MOO!!! IF COWS COULD READ, I GUARANTEE THIS WOULD BE ON THEIR FAVORITE READING MATERIALS LIST!!!! But cows can't read so you'll have to settle with me :D LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE IT!!!

[John Phoenix Hutchinson.]

You should add these reviews to your portfolio of work on here:)

[TL Boehm]

this is a gem amongst the usual cafe fare of love, vampires and odd humor. I try to jump out of my comfort zone - explore different themes in my work - I believe all writers should stretch themselves from time to time. This was a strong poem - well done, well studied and a reminder that humanity has never place nice. We've always been at each other.

[John Phoenix Hutchinson.]

I try to be different.......as often as I can.

[JGIII]

You've got some grammatical errors the apostrophe in souls for example. Also the third line feels like you forced it to get the rhyme.
I like the idea though you wrote it like a saga. I think skald style suits you.

[John Phoenix Hutchinson.]

my thanks :)

[DrD]

The tale of Masada . . . . as the guides tell it . . . . has many remaining mysteries. We only know the tale from Josephus but the Ben Harim guides suggest there might have been survivors who escaped. At any rate, you have given literary drama to the tale and done so in exquisite style. A very interesting and worthy read.

[John Phoenix Hutchinson.]

http://www.bibliotecapleyades.net/biblianazar/esp_biblianazar_55.htm

[Junger]

The image goes with this piece this piece also is very precise in the very tone and mood this pops

[John Phoenix Hutchinson.]

thankyou.

[FocusedAmnesia]

Every line was a mouthful of imagery. It was as if you are standing right there.

[John Phoenix Hutchinson.]

my thanks :)

[Green]

I had never heard this story before now but I'm glad I got to hear about this way. You do a wonderful job of telling a story.

[John Phoenix Hutchinson.]

Its an interesting historical event.....that has become mythical.

[Abdul Batin Osman Bey]

The pace feels like a rushing towards war, great historical notes that pop out, captures the intensity of the revolt.

[John Phoenix Hutchinson.]

my thanks :)

[Krista Weiss]

Nice poem!!

[John Phoenix Hutchinson.]

my thanks :)

[Pencrafter]

Your poem shows the heartbreak and waste of human life in warfare. When people refuse to believe the truth and face reality they sometimes think there is some kind of glory in death. And in all civilizations throughout history there has been no shortage of radical fanatics willing to shed their own blood and that of everyone else. Religion is the main culprit in all of this horror.

[John Phoenix Hutchinson.]

my thanks :)

[Ina Waltz]

I might have a strange sense of humour, but 'No pleasure or joy they found, their enemies ALL DEAD!' made me laugh out loud. Brilliant piece!

[John Phoenix Hutchinson.]

my thanks :)