I Will Always be with You

A girl asked a boy if she was pretty,

 he said "No". 

She asked him if he wanted to be with her forever,

 he said "No".

 Then she asked him if he would cry if she walked away,

 he said "No". 

She had heard enough; she was going to leave.

As she walked away,

he grabbed her hand and told her to stay. 

He said, "You are not pretty, 

you are beautiful.

 I don't want to be with you forever,

 I need to be with you forever.

 And I wouldn't cry if you walked away.

 I would die."

Reviews

[Rahul]

Emotional enchantment of words you've pondered your poetry with! It's very unique style to read something in rainbow color with much depth of words. Every day, countless people/lovers pass through such melancholy things of love. Some conquer the hearts so some left craved for having love. It's a life where one gets love & the other only the figment of its shades... but whatever it's all 'bout, life never stops not even the time. Moments pass away & by the end, everything gets ended even the life so, It's better to admire what one has got in hands. Love's a very beautiful thing that's meant to be treasured in all senses, no matter how needy it may appear to heart. Nice imagery!

[Sharon]

Nice. Beautiful structure. I like the explination in the end. I think the moa
St catching line was "she had heard enough; she was going to leave." Great job. Keep writing!

[Katlyn Ribine]

thank you!

[Sharon]

Your welcome.

[Julie Butler]

very sweet. You write songs?

[Katlyn Ribine]

well, i write lyrics for it but i don't make up the melody

[zainul]

I was sad to hear the loud "No" four times.
But,I won a joyful paradise when I heard the boy said,
" And I wouldn't cry if you walked away.
I would die."
You marked your own style at 'fourteen' !
Congratulations,Katlyn Ribine !!!

[17thWhitePrince]

Not bad . . . not bad =D
A really sweet piece indeed !!!

I liked how he explained himself in the end

"You are not pretty,
you are beautiful.
I don't want to be with you forever,
I need to be with you forever.
And I wouldn't cry if you walked away.
I would die."

Well done indeed !!!

[Vikrantsingh]

Good Work :)

[Angi]

Nice!

[Sam]

eye catching

[Gobinder Singh Dhindsa]

Colourful typing lovely.. Well Done! Keep it up! Do u read mine 2 TIME and MANNER..if possible then gives ur review..