Innocent Coward

She hid in caves her whole life,

Looking at the stars and wondering;

Dreaming they could whisper secrets

If she could open her ears to listen.

 

She hid from the sun in hollowed crevices,

Scared it would show her for what she was

In a way that the flickering candlelight

Never seemed to do.

 

She passed old lanterns to travelling souls,

Wanderers passing with hollow pretence.

Fools too sure of the path to know

That it had to be wrong if it felt that right.

 

She dreamt of escape from the echoing vault,

Of emerging as somebody who’d never seen darkness

But to emerge into sunlight took more courage

Than this innocent coward could find.

Reviews

[Frank James Davis]

While written in the third person, this excellent creative outburst appears to be part of a conversation with yourself; its actual and complete meaning, known only to you--even if, mostly, on a subconscious or unconscious level.
"Innocent Coward" strikes me as very fine poetry.
That third stanza is especially intriguing. Here, the poetess seems to indicate that feelings based on practiced sin or too-easily accepted error can often seem quite "right." Otherwise, a well-tuned conscience--having been meticulously programmed with as much truth as was available--would have, long ago, sounded the alarm.
Now, Kaya, I'll obviously have to add "thought-provoking" to my assessment of your very fine poetry.
Extremely promising work!

[R. L. Ives]

Very profound imagery. I love when poetry reveals itself not as just words you read but also as words that transform into visions. You have done a superb job.

[Adam Crate]

Interesting read. I love the imagery you used; it painted the very grim picture of a girl unwilling to face herself. The third stanza was my favorite because to me it implied that she viewed anyone on a sure path as being wrong, as if her remaining in the darkness with her worries was a better choice than facing the light.

[Kaya]

I'm glad you enjoyed it. I guess I was just thinking about things like racism. No one ever does anything big with their life thinking its the wrong thing to do, and yet a lot of the time that's the case. Of course now that I've read your interpretation i think i prefer it!!!

[Mary]

"Fools too sure of the path to know that it had to be wrong if it felt that right" a powerful line indeed. This is such a sad poem. As I was reading, I kept hoping, hoping, hoping that she would emerge into the light, and view her true beauty, but alas, it wasn't her time. Beautifully done.

[Kaya]

Thank you so much for such a lovely review.

[pumpkin head]

This is a really good write, I could feel the emotions

[John F]

Quite beautiful indeed :) I enjoy the implication that any journey worth taking is necessarily a path of suffering. That doubt is a neccesary component of hope:)
Also, the different light sources; stars, candles, lanterns, sunlight provided blissful comparison.

[Kaya]

Thank you :)

[Shimmerbliss/CAF]

And yet she could never emerge as someone who had never seen darkness, because she is well acquainted with it. She would indeed be able to help others with her knowledge of it, and with her appreciation for the sunshine. This speaks to me of one who has watched and seen and learned so much that they are hesitant to participate in what seems to be very threatening. Many of us have felt this way. You have expressed this so well. This poem gives me feeling and speaks. Thanks.

[Kaya]

I think in the first two lines of your review, you've captured pretty much the mood I found myself in when inspiration struck I'm just glad that for once, i managed to make it something other people could recognize the emotion in. Thank you for such a glowing review! It really makes my day to wake up to a message like this one!!

[Shimmerbliss/CAF]

Nice job! :)

[Devons]

A clever allegory, written with a thoughtful intelligence and heart. There is a clear and winning voice whispering between these lines and this clarity washes over the reader refreshingly, invigorating with meaning and insight.
These lines are grand:
"Fools too sure of the path to know
That it had to be wrong if it felt that right."
Really good.

[Kaya]

Thank you so much for such a lovely review. Its always good to know i'm on the right track with my writing!! I'm glad you enjoyed it.

[Neva Flores - Changeful..]

Fantastic Prose Kaya, inspirational and full of sorrow at the same time.

[lynn]

Poems don't always rhyme and this one is certainly full of depth and emotion! Very good piece of art, my dear poetess :)

[Kaya]

Thank :) I was insanely nervous to post it so I'm glad you enjoyed it!!