Volatile upside down smile

Volatile upside down smile

A Poem by KeeD

I'm like some sort of homemade dynamite
with an aftertaste like burnt coffee at a diner
That kind of addictive not made by design
Burning down Cairo like it was a matter of time

You come seeking answers about skeletons
Like all your questions are somehow relevant
Having you build up walls
So I can take them down like some sort of cannonball 

My mouth gives my brain motion sickness
like two ghosts fighting over who's more alive
Maybe it's because i'm a slave to the heartache
And every breath I've taken since is a waste of my time



© 2017 KeeD



Author's Note

KeeD

My Review

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Reviews

This very honest writing. Lines are in perfect order. I can see you really work hard on it. Or you got great talent. I like it cause of lines and words hold very well together.

Posted 1 Month Ago


KeeD

1 Month Ago

Thank you so much for your review. I hardly work on my writings, their like blurts of my thought pro.. read more
to me this poem is about a person with severe internal conflict resulting in anger which can be felt through the words you put together so elegantly yet in a powerful way.
'My mouth gives my brain motion sickness
like two ghosts fighting over who's more alive'
beautiful lines, extremely deep and powerful. you gave a wonderful imagery of pain and wrath that comes from deep within.
this was amazing.
im so glad i stumbled upon your writes. you write beautifully !!


Posted 2 Months Ago


KeeD

1 Month Ago

I like that you used the word wrath to describe the emotion of this piece, it is definitely an inter.. read more
Some souls abound in restless energy. The outer world must match their inner, more beautiful one. They are impulsive and explosive but loving and giving. I feel I am reading about one such sensitive soul here.

My mouth gives my brain motion sickness
like two ghosts fighting over who's more alive

Loved the lines. Identified with them very much.

Posted 2 Months Ago


KeeD

2 Months Ago

Thank you, I definitely feel like those two lines are some of the best I've ever come up with, and i.. read more
Well buddy,your writing still seems to have a downward tilt but the beauty and strong use of metaphor are duely noted.Last stanza my favorite in particular "my mouth gives my brain motion sickness.Dead on for any writer! I've tried to use the sites friending device but with little success.Old guy with old computer,but yes I can be a friend in need at your command.Lets both keep on truckin

Posted 2 Months Ago


KeeD

2 Months Ago

If i'm being honest with myself and with all of you, I write to music, with a busy schedule and a ma.. read more
"You come seeking answers about skeletons..."
Brilliant.

Posted 2 Months Ago


KeeD

2 Months Ago

Thank you Mirror
Written with so much emotion and intensity. We are all slaves to heartache in some sense, yet we do keep moving forward no matter the consequences.

Posted 2 Months Ago


KeeD

2 Months Ago

Well said Traci, your soul could illuminate the darkest places. Thank you for the review
This one hits hard. Like you can really feel the emotion behind it. You keep going although you know it will be destructive. You're putting so much work in... only to be crushed in the end later.

xo FLB

Posted 2 Months Ago


KeeD

2 Months Ago

It's like you've traced the design of my life in the review. Thank you friend, for always getting my.. read more

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7 Reviews
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Added on September 8, 2017
Last Updated on September 11, 2017

Author

KeeD
KeeD

Mumbai, India, India



About
Hey i'm Kee, 27 years old and come from the culturally blessed land of India. I'm an amateur poet at best and I spill my writes out to music and current emotion. Leave a review and I'll be happy to re.. more..

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