Insomnia Part VIIA Chapter by M.Kilani Another scene of a man who suffer insomnia Reheats his coffee, 3:48 is the time, yesternight he was asleep, had a dream, he never dreams, but the night before he did, rambling between his mind and heart, between shades and rainbows, looking for answers in music, he finds more questions in the silence among the songs, he lights a cigarette, dwells in the deepest of void, a gunshot interrupts his silence to bring him awake, to bring him peace of mind;
The smell of lighter’s fluid and gunpowder takes him back to the scene, takes him back in time; 3:05 was the time; “It would've made things easier... but they are not that easy, not that complicated as well... just turn into a robot and let the rust eat you inside out.” “He wanted to see her laughing, she laughs it hurts him, he was never there, he didn't make that laughter, and now he sobs the night away” said the young lookalike. “he walks to his bed, holding his cup of coffee, no intention to sleep he cracks his new lighter and smokes another cigarette”
“tick tock… tick tock you are a fool you bite the hook” “I already know it’s a game, but for once I thought it’s not the same” “and now it’s time for you to turn them tables, think of your future, and you might wear a suit like mine, and then you would make your game and your own rules” A familiar sound whispers in the background (Here I lay awake in bed, whispers something in my head) “I know that sound very well” he said (can't sleep can't breath can't smoke can't eat, it's like I’m numb from head to feet) the voice continues “what sound” they all have asked “we here nothing” “crazy toys in the attic you’re crazy...” “he’s not crazy, he’s just being dramatic” “snap out of it my friend” “they all were worried, even himself, they couldn’t hear a thing, not even I, they all took a minute of silent to make sure” (A heavy stone over my chest, makes me want to cut my wrest) “show yourself” he said “don’t fear them they can’t hear you” “she drove you crazy didn’t she” laughs the sarcastic one” that is my duty to drive you crazy” “you never learn, you think you’re brave” “one part brave, three parts fool” (acting mad with death obsessed. Touched by a demon am I possessed?) “perhaps I need a drink” he puts aside his coffee and goes to another room “he opens the safe of his riches, reaches for a bottle of old fine wine, the last that he got, pours some to himself, pours some on the ground in respect for gods” “tick tock… tick tock….” “shut up” he interrupts “listen carefully” (Beats my heart as loud as thunder, numb is the skin and there's nothing under) “we hear nothing” “he walks back to his bed with his wine, reaches for his drawer and takes out a gun” “what now, are you going to shoot us” “crazy over the rainbow he’s crazy… surely gone fishing” “you know better than that my friend” stands up uses his lighter to light a cigar “anywhere the wind blows? What nonsense is that?” puts aside the lighter, yet no smoke comes off his cigar; “it’s a waste of talent to kill yourself, you have a bright future ahead, all you have to do is work harder” (acting mad with death obsessed. Touched by a demon am I possessed?) “all that because of her, you’ll find another who’d appreciate you for who you are” “tick tock… tick tock he finds them answers written on a glock” “he puts a bullet in the clip, locks it, turns off the light, silence takes over” (Soul relief when god's name I say, though I'm lost and hardly pray) (acting mad with death obsessed. Touched by a demon am I possessed?) 3:33am he reheats his coffee, lights a cigarette, figures out the game, “time to turn tables”, bang, a shot in the face; “rebirth of darkness.” © 2012 M.KilaniAuthor's Note
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