Chaos

Chaos

A Story by Kaliope

Pretend sits upon her dream-cloud throne, looking into the portals below. Each one was a different mind. Sorting through the masses was irritating but occasionally her fascination peaked. Most a bore...Nightmares about work or going to school naked or brief dreams about nonsensical things. All a waste of time, not that time was a limited commodity. Pretend only enters intellectual hallucinations, filled with purpose, where she can make an impact. Why play in a childish fairy-tale when she can corrupt the real world? 

They tried to banish and curse her for the crimes. They sent her here, this forsaken fantasy-land, where she could only exist in dreams and limbo. They believed she couldn't be a terror here. However, the fallen Goddess could incite destruction from the minds of simpletons as well as wisemen. Everyone felt vulnerable in their nightly visions. No one was protected from "their" own thoughts. 

She flipped impatiently through dreams as if they were pages in a book, rolling her pistachio eyes at pathetic illusions. Each snippet showed some person or a mundane atmosphere...How tedious. At least sleeping people were plentiful. With nothing to do, the endless searching was in fact a blessing. Pretend wished more of her time was spent tampering rather than seeking.

Her freckles matched her bronze hair. It was metallic and a giant heap that trailed behind her and draped over her massive seat. She had some comforts and a place to live but no food or drink for she was neither dead nor living. This was her purgatory until judgment day. She was supposed to be mad by that time. 

"A fair consequence," was what they called it. She dismantled countless lives through breeding self-doubt and insanity. Yes, she supposed it was equitable but she didn't have to like it. Pretend certainly didn't intend to stop. "No new ones tonight," she mumbled to herself. No matter. With nothing to do, she turned to the minds of presidents for amusement.


© 2017 Kaliope



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Featured Review

You are a great writer! I enjoyed this immensely: How you waited to describe her appearance, the seemingly effortless explanation of her circumstances. How fantastical, how beautiful, how grand! I would like it best with the last line left of. It's good for a punch line, but your story feels like so much more to me. Bravo! I.I.

Posted 7 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Kaliope

7 Months Ago

Thanks, I would like to add more to this one eventually
Isabella Ivy

7 Months Ago

I bet it will be great! :) I.I.



Reviews

This was just straight boring. Sorry. I know you're trying to be experimental and profound but this was just annoying to read. Your poetry is pretty bad but your stories are just flat uninteresting and pretentious. Whatever your inspiration is, change it up cause that garbage clearly isn't working.

Posted 2 Months Ago


You are a great writer! I enjoyed this immensely: How you waited to describe her appearance, the seemingly effortless explanation of her circumstances. How fantastical, how beautiful, how grand! I would like it best with the last line left of. It's good for a punch line, but your story feels like so much more to me. Bravo! I.I.

Posted 7 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Kaliope

7 Months Ago

Thanks, I would like to add more to this one eventually
Isabella Ivy

7 Months Ago

I bet it will be great! :) I.I.
My favorite you have posted online thus far... You have both struck a blazing path of unique imagery, and shown an inherent control for breath in story telling that edges on poetic. I can smell her hair, taste her eyes, and feel her characters disgust for humanity bled through at every turn of phrase... Fantastic stuff.... Keep it up...

Posted 9 Months Ago


1 of 2 people found this review constructive.

This comment has been deleted by the poster.
Kaliope

9 Months Ago

thank you! (: I'm experimenting by adding small doses of characters' traits and interweaving their p.. read more
Good, but needs minor revision, at least in my humble opinion. I really like the Title! You should add more to it, though you don't really have to, I just think it would be improved if it was slightly longer. Still, a fairly good story that speaks to your greater potential in the future.

:D ;)

Posted 9 Months Ago


1 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Kaliope

9 Months Ago

thanks! perhaps I'll add more soon.
Lovecraft

9 Months Ago

Yeah, if you elongate it just make it a New Version and I'll check it out again.
Seems more an more like the real world is a childish nightmare/fairy-tale. As bad as that may seem. Chaos is the perfect title for this and I think you did an excellent job at telling that story.

Posted 9 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Kaliope

9 Months Ago

thanks so much
You have a talent for imagery. That’s hard sometimes. I like the narrator: the muse of nightmares. It’s sort of a modern day mythical story. Very good. Keep writing.

Posted 9 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Kaliope

9 Months Ago

thank you for the kind words

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6 Reviews
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Added on January 17, 2017
Last Updated on June 4, 2017

Author

Kaliope
Kaliope

Denver, CO



About
Experimental Writer Inspiration: My husband, Silente, as well as raw emotion, personal experience, nature, and simplicity. I write mostly modern fiction and poetry. more..

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