The Fourth Hour

Horace B. Williams, a murderer?

The last time Horace B. Williams skipped school somebody died.  Somebody died that he knew really well who had been very much alive the day before.  Even though a couple of friends told him it wasn't his fault, deep down he figured it had to be.  Everything was his fault.

 

Horace B. Williams was born on the fourth day of the fourth month in a year ending with four and became the fourth child of the  William's family who named him Horace.  They lived at Four Lexington Avenue and had four cats.  Mrs. Williams, his mother, had been born with four fingers on her left hand. Every day at four o'clock sharp, Horace's mother sat down to watch The Oprah Winfrey Show.  It lasted exactly one hour, during which time she expected not to be bothered unless hell itself was freezing over.

 

It was four thirty in the afternoon when he found out his classmate from school had died.  It was four thirty-one when he realized it was all his fault.  He looked at the clock and then looked at the back of his mother's head and then beyond his mother's head to the TV screen where the Oprah WInfrey Show was going to a commercial.  In most households, a kid could speak during commercials, but not in his household between four o'clock and five o'clock, commercials included.

 

Horace B. Williams started to cry at exactly four forty-five.  He had to tell somebody about what had happened while he was skipping school.  He just HAD to.  So he blurted it out at the back of his mom's head just as Oprah's face reappeared on the TV screen.

 

"Mom!  I didn't go to school today.  I killed Oscar Andersen."

 

His mother didn't even turn her head to look in his direction. She reached for the big afghan  on the back of the couch by groping behind her and then pulled it tight around her.  From where she sat she tossed the TV Guide and The Reader's Digest into the open fireplace along with four toss pillows that came with the couch.  She asked her son to light a match and start a fire.

 

"But Mom, did you even hear what I just said?  I didn't go to school today and I think I  killed Oscar Andersen!"

 

Horace B. Williams' mother just stared at the TV screen.  Oprah Winfrey was laughing at some guy jumping up and down on her couch.

 

"Horace, we've got bigger things to worry about.  Hell's frozen over and we're out of firewood."

Reviews

[Dane Osborne]

This was very cool....seriously. This struck me as talking about the apathy that our oversaturated culture has induced on the average citizen. If that was what you were talking about then you handled it in a very fresh and original way. You took a horrible situation and mixed it with humor very masterfully. BTW going into favorites:)

[roarke]

Yikes.... anything with Ofrah in it is strange.... I find this interesting because you write so definite and clear, then you break a character's rule in the story with a possible tragedy that may or may not have happened then you foreshadow a reaction, THEN you inject some humor.... there's just gotta be more to this boy story.... very well written. Very original. Bravo.

[zig]

i love this story linda, love these absurd little flashes... too clever. great write my friend, and a pleasure to read

[bob, small b. aka invs]

poor horace.

i like the improbable world you created for this character. it lies somewhere between kafka and shel silverstein. the world may be improbable, but the feelings of poor horace seemed very real. i loved this little story.

[alan peter kelly]

this is a keeper...a PRIZE winner!!! Oprah on at 4pm in America? over here, it's judge judy, followed by the bold and the beautiful!! haha this is LAUGH OUT LOUD material....your wit and observations into aspects of the human condition (and childhood) are constants here....such an entertaining write...i wont rabbit on or add too many over-utilized superlatives but must say this is one of the funniest short stories i have read for a considerable time...concise / balanced / with a perfectly timed finale...yes...as with all humour...timing is important and you have certainly nailed it with this one...a privilege to be one of the first to read :)