Sometimes I wish You Didn't Exist

Sometimes, I just want to let you come home

and pretend that all this s**t that happened

wasn’t your fault

and yours alone

because I miss the times

when you were the person I looked up to;

the times when I believed

that there’s not a bad thing about you.

 

Sometimes, I forget how much I hate you,

I forget how much you don’t care

about everything you put our family through

because I can’t seem to let go

of the innocent little girl

who looked so proud to be my sister

the day I came into this world.

And I know that life goes on,

I understand that people change

But I never thought that one day

I would wake up to find you gone.

 

Sometimes, I just want to knock on your door

and apologise

even though I have nothing to be saying sorry for

because, even though my walls are built up high

and I act like I don’t care

I still wish that we had never said goodbye.

And I’m ready to lay down my armour

because I’m tired of this futile fight

if only you would surrender

and realise it’s about time

that this war was over.