Diamond Eyes

Diamond Eyes

A Story by Jocelyn Law
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This story is about a man consumed by selfishness.

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One day lived a man of great selfishness. His love for his own possession out did his love for his own family, which profoundly cost him. He lived in a small house with his wife and daughter and made a small profit. They did not have much but the support from each other. He was a good man; many admired and adored him. He was humble and kind-hearted. After many year of doing the same boring job, the man dragged himself to the same place doing the same thing, but this time he came across a strange figure. The stranger asked for some money for exchange of a small gift. He did not have much to give but he gave what he had. He did not want the man’s gift, for he did not want to take something from someone who already didn’t have anything. The stranger insisted on it as a token of gratitude, and with respect the man took it and thanked him. He opened the small box on his way to work and there he found a small diamond that looked plastic. It was nice and he was grateful for it and kept it.  On the way home that night he found his life to be very boring. He did not make enough to support his family, he was not able to do the things he wanted, he was not happy. His feelings surfaced his eyes as he started to weep. Oddly enough his tears were not wet, but heavy. He opened his eyes and looked down to where his tears would have fallen and saw something small and quite shiny. He bent down to see what is possibly could be. He observed his “tears” and only found diamonds. The man cried diamonds. He could finally be a rich man. He ran home in excitement and showed his wife and daughter his new discovery. They were over joyed, as they knew their lives would be well now.  The man cried and cried and cried making mountains of diamonds. Their lives were new and they became very wealthy. They could now have a big house with full meals and servants and anything they wished for. This was a blessing and a curse. The kind-hearted humble man now became selfish. His heart was no longer soft but hard. He walked ostentatiously and saw himself higher than others. He did not see the needs of others but only saw his new wealth. He found that the world was finally good to him. One night he tried to cry more diamonds, but they would not come out. There was nothing to cry about anymore, he had a good life. He tried and tried but nothing. Nothing could make him cry. He thought for days but could not come up with any reason to cry, except one. His selfishness consumed him so he decided it must be done. One cold winter night him, his wife, and his daughter sat around a fire. His wife and daughter prayed to God thanking him for the riches He gave them, but the man on the other hand did not. While the daughter and wife were praying, the man silently got up. He got up behind them and stabbed his wife first. The daughter in shock, started crying and looked her father in the eye knowing she was next. The eyes she use to look at when he taught her how to walk, how to write, how to love, have now gone black. She saw no soul inside him. He killed her next. The man held both his most beloved wife in one arm and his daughter in the other as he sat on a pile of diamonds. 

© 2016 Jocelyn Law


Author's Note

Jocelyn Law
Please comment about your thoughts on the story. Thank you for the feedback!

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Featured Review

It nice I like the flow of words and it has a well amount of description. It is quite nice.I really like this story.If I am to be picky the starting can be slightly worked upon a longer introduction would have been nice. It still is a very nice yet simple piece.I truly enjoyed it.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

A nice story. Actually a very good one. It has a beginning, middle, and end.

The only suggestions would to put into short story format. A huge block of text is a bit difficult to read. It might not be a bad idea to add dialogue for the characters to bring them to life.

Writing is all about communication. All of the above would help to communicate your ideas.

You are a talented story teller.


Posted 8 Years Ago


It nice I like the flow of words and it has a well amount of description. It is quite nice.I really like this story.If I am to be picky the starting can be slightly worked upon a longer introduction would have been nice. It still is a very nice yet simple piece.I truly enjoyed it.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on November 15, 2015
Last Updated on May 4, 2016

Author

Jocelyn Law
Jocelyn Law

CA



About
I'm a 18 year old aspiring writer. My stories are amateur, but I hope you enjoy reading them as much as I enjoy writing them. more..

Writing