Clouding Chat rooms

Clouding Chat rooms

A Poem by Lei

Enter my chat room, I dare ya! In love with the mind, a dreamer!

Foster my intellect, preside over my random thoughts, and amorphous my feelings.
 I like to dream. 
 It is impossible to fathom as the breath of the universe.
 What do I speak of with love?
The brain. 
 Even when you don't let me sleep.

© 2017 Lei

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S few points:

Don't talk to your reader, involve them, emotionally.

And aside from not knowing who might want shapeless feelings, "amorphous" is not a verb.

And finally, though you might have intent for the disconnected thoughts that intent doesn't make it to the text, so it's lost.

Sorry my news isn't better.

Posted 8 Months Ago

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1 Review
Added on November 10, 2017
Last Updated on November 10, 2017
Tags: Dreamer, dreams, adventure, universe, science, love, brain



Los Angeles , CA

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