I Wish

A poem about someone who I desperatly miss.

Are you near? Are you far?

I wish I was where you are.

I wish you dreamt of me at night.

I wish I had you in my sight.

I hurt you, now I pay the price.

Will I ever have you in my life?

I’d do anything just to see your face.

I wish I had you in my embrace.

I miss you so badly, I hurt every day.

I guess this is the price I pay.

Reviews

[Obscured by the Shadows]

People can easily relate to this one. So many people make mistakes and, in consequence, lose someone very dear to them. It is a painful thing to endure. Mistakes are not easily forgiven, if only it were so easy.

I too have made a mistake and, in reaction, lost someone I love more than anyone, how I am going to deal with that, I don't know, but I will seek to manage. I do hope you find reconciliation for the mistake you assumptuously made. Well done, full rates.

[Peyton Light]

Thank you. I try to make my poems very relatable as they are usually about things I am going through at the time. I want the readers to see how I feel when I am writing.

[Obscured by the Shadows]

And in turn, the discover they are not the only ones feeling that way, very well done.

[Tanvi Banjan]

I really like this one. It's so damn amazing.

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

This is very deep and emotional and quite heartbreaking.
Comes straight from your heart.
So much feeling in this and depth.
The rhyme scheme in this is great it rhymes the whole way through, and the rhymes are flawless.
Great write :)

[Leo]

I like the rhythm and melody in your poem..read with natural flow and ease..way to go!

[Peyton Light]

Thanks you very much :)

[Constant]

Short and beautiful. The use of "now I pay the price/this is the price I pay" on lines 5 and 10 was well executed!

[maria ( rose)]

Every prayer is a wish fulfilled in due time.

[mattavelli]

Hello, Peyton, your message here is clear. Why not give it a nice meter?

[Peyton Light]

What do you mean "Meter"?

[Caleb]

meter is the beat in which a poem follows. It insures that the poem is not choppy and gives it a certain amount of syllables that each line can have. Yours in particular was good, but was a little choppy in some places. Do not worry so much about this; the more you write, the easier it is for you write with a meter.