Part four: Harler

finally, Harler's chapter.

 

Harler

   It's finally my turn for a chapter? Yay!

   Cutie's munching his carrots in the veggie bin and I was petting his brown, cotton tail, thinking, That was a nice boy I met, I wonder if he liked me. I think his name was Jackson? I bet he like Cuti-

   I tensed. Something was wrong, I could feel it. Or I could sometimes feel it. I had a hyper sense that told me if darkness or something odd was lurking around before Kalilee, Rycel, or Junia could, but Kalilee claims my "extreme paranoia" gets in the way of that. But, hey, at least one eighth of the time something really was stalking us! 

   I looked around for a shadowy figure or something that radiated "wrong!" to me, but so far I couldn't pick up anythin-

   There. That man with dark brown hair and a toothy grin and eyes that wandered to a baby stroller looked awfully strange to me, even stranger than I was. I need to tell someone, Kalilee! I called with me telepathy which allows me to talk to the other angels with my mind, Kalilee, I'm sensing something weird, get Rycel and Junia! Oh, and have you ever tried a papaya? I'm looking at them right now and they look like something Justin Timberlake tweeted about once.

   I heard Kalilee sigh through the telepathy link, I'm coming right now. Don't bother Junia or she'll explode, you know that. And Harler? Put the papaya down. 

   I huffed, I hadn't even picked it up yet... Okay now this guy was looking me and giving me The Creeps. And worse, he looked like he'd smell funny. 

   I glance back to him uneasily and stuffed an annoyed Cutie back into my purse where he'd be safe from the forces of evil. Or at least the forces of evil in my imagination. Have I ever told you I have a habit of hallucinating? It's no biggie, hallucinating can actually be fun if your hallucinating Justin Timberlake giving you a hug, but then when everyone sees you hugging the air it can get kind of awkward for some reason. 

   Kalilee came striding around the corner all "no nonsense" like she always did (Like a boss!) whenever something was going on. She's totally unlike Rycel who was cracking jokes on her near-death bed one time.

   "Where's our threat?" Kalilee asked me aloud, but quietly, and I flicked my green eyes to the creepy man who seemed to be watching us now.

   "Is someone really standing there or am I finally going banaynays?" I asked under my breath, because I didn't want to be heard by a little girl scrambling to pick up some carrots for her mom.

   "Mommy, these are already half eaten!" The little girl said. Oopsy-daisy.

   Kalilee shot me a look for that, but said, "No, he's real and I'm sensing something off about him, too." she said, "Come on, we need to see if he could be a danger to anyone."

   I nodded. I couldn't draw weapons out of willpower like Kalilee, Rycel, or Junia could, but I had a secret "weapon" of my own. So if this guy lays a hand on my precious, wecious Cutie, he was a dead man.

   Kalilee looked the creepy man right in his predatory eyes, tightening her blonde ponytail one last time, and fearlessly started to walk towards him with me in tow. Ha! In tow! Like a tow truck *beep beep!*.

   The man notices we're approaching him dead-on and like light notices darkness, darkness can tune into light. We don't know what he is yet, but he seems to know what, and who we are now (that's not hard to believe, we're kind of infamous in Hell, we might have killed his bubby or sissy or something) and in a glitch of panic his human disguise fails for a fraction of a second, but that's long enough for Kalilee and I to see. 

   His eyes are solid black, his green veins bulge all over his body, he has a long snout instead of a normal human face, and his teeth are sharp, like when you lick a candy cane all the way down to the point bottom. He's not human, he's a ghoul. A.K.A. a really fugly looking weak creature that does in fact smell funny. 

   "Ghoul." Kalilee quietly snarls.

   The ghoul is quickly backing away through the soup isle with its yummy tomato soup. Maybe tomatoes remind him of blood, because they remind me of ponies because ponies like vegetables, or are they really fruits? I was always skeptical of that. 

   "We need to lead him into a place where we can kill him, and fast," Kalilee says, getting me back on track, "but out of the way of the humans. What we're going to do is chase him to the back door in the back of the store. There's a big open field behind Wal-Mart where we can take him out and not hurt anybody, okay? I go left, you go right. Got it?"

   "Mm-hm." I say. When Kalilee tells you she has a plan and you don't follow it, it can mean the almost end of the human world. Hee-hee, whoops! But don't worry, unless that giant, monstrous Kraken-

   Crud. Kalilee's already gone. I make a sharp turn and start speed walking to the right, looking for Mr. Creeps and singing "Santa Baby" over and over again in my head. I love that song, don't you?

   When I get to the back of the store with still no sign of Mr. Creeps when I finally spot him trying to be a little sneak going into the janitor's closet. "Hey!" I say, grabbing the back of his brown sweater with supernatural force no normal seventeen year old should be able to do. Well, I look seventeen, and have the youngest mortal appearance in the group. 

   "Harler." Mr. Creeps hisses between his candy cane sharp teeth, "It's an honor to meet you."

   How flattering he knew me by name! "They always say that." I tell him, batting my reddish eyelashes, "They always say that right before I kill them."

   The ghoul's eyes widened, his human eyes, and I let him wriggle himself out of my grip and speed off in the opposite direction to where Kalilee would be waiting for him and could keep civilians out of the way. Hey, just a question, but have you ever used a hoola-hoop without the water in it? It doesn't work as well as the ones that do. I know because I used to have this red one that had the water until Junia took it away from me because I accidentally hit her with it about twenty times.

   Sorry, I know they tell me not to get off topic, but its just so fun having you to talk with! But, okay, back to the chase...

   I followed Mr. Creeps all the way to the back door where he didn't suspect a thing and I giggled. Poor, poor ghoul. Thank everything holy there weren't any people around to watch this.

   Kalilee jumped from where she was silently clinging to the ceiling bars and landed neatly on the ghoul's back and she clamped a hand over his mouth. Laughing, I swing the back door open and push Kalilee and the ghoul through to the outside, and I follow swinging the door shut behind me. I loved this game! 

   Now in Kalilee's "I'm the boss and you're not" way (like a boss!), she cleanly jumped off of the ghoul's back and let him collide with the pavement where I could hold him down, ignoring his pleas and threats. Come on, ghoul! How long do you think I've been doing this job? 

   Kalilee looks skyward, closes her eyes in concentration, and held out her hand. She murmurs the name "Gabriel" which is how she draws her TrueColor sword that conjures in her hand.   

   The TrueColor sword alternately gleams the twenty eight primary colors of Heaven and can slice through any ghoul with ease.

   Kalilee set her merciless (scary) blue eyes on the hyperventilating, struggling ghoul and points the lightweight TrueColor sword at his throat.

   "We can do this my way, or the easy way. Which will it be?" She asks.

  

  

  

  

Author's Note

hey, so this is Harler's chapter... sad to say, not the hardest one to get inside her head... so what do you think? Criticism is seriously needed, but just a note, Harler is crazy and that's how some of her descriptions are just going to be.

Reviews

[Bella Luna]

I love Harler and her obsession with Justin Timberlake! This was such a funny and action packed chapter!

[RachelReaper]

thank you for reading, Bella! :)

[Horizon K.]

This is definitely action infused with humor. Instead of getting creeped out by this ghoul I'm totally laughing about half eaten carrots and the ghouls "fugliness". Super fun to read!

[MOON]

Enjoying this all the characters and I like the sense if humour.

[j]

This Chapter Is "Spectacular".It Really "Progresses" The Story line And "Introduces" Some New Elements (Such As The Ghoul And Sword) Effectively,In Small Pieces.Harler,Along With The Other Angels,Is An Amazing Character.The Differences And Similarities Between The Angels Are Distinguishable,Making The Personality Of Each Angel Unique.The Manner,In Which The Story,Is Told Is Quite Entertaining.,As Well(" It's finally my turn for a chapter? Yay!").

[The dark story]

i should say she's the cutest character of all....she sprinkles the colour of fun in the story.i was just laughing uncontrollably when i was going through this chapter......i mean she's on her way to kill someone and then suddenly jumping to hoola hoop...what was she doing??.hahahahaah...she's really awesome.brilliant characterization!!!

[RachelReaper]

thank you, many people like Harler the best. i think I need to do some better characterization with Rycel, though, people don't seem to like her as much and I want them to like her.

[The dark story]

oh...but i think you have done your best....i mean everyone likes a cute childish girl(as they are mostly responsible to make us laugh)......but to be wise.i like all the girls.they differ in their attitude and behavior and that's what i think is the best part of your work to show a strong team of people of different color!!

[RachelReaper]

:) thank you for the encouragment

[The Invisible Girl]

Harler is hilarious and cuckoo! lol :P Can't wait for the next chapter! :D

[Taylor H.]

It's finally my turn for a chapter? Yay! -----(Not a fan of talking like you know you’re in a book)

That was a nice boy I met, I wonder if he liked me. I think his name was Jackson? I bet he like Cuti- ------(Make a new paragraph, also watch out for spelling and grammar issues, I saw a few places were you missed a few words…example for this sentence “I bet he like cuti- should be “I bet he liked or likes cuti-)

I looked around for a shadowy figure or something that radiated "wrong!" to me, but so I wasn't- -------(confusing)

That man with dark brown hair and a toothy grin and eyes that wandered to a baby stroller looked awfully strange to me, even stranger than I was. ------. (What baby stoller? And she wouldn’t point out she thought she was strange. She just IS crazy. She wouldn’t comment on it. In fact, she would think it was perfectly normal)

I called with me telepathy which allows me to talk to the other angels with my mind,-----, (I called with MY telepathy, I think this also needs a little more and less description….maybe say I called to Kaliee with my telepathy (and instead of saying what it is just describe what shes doing) like I felt her mind answer my thoughts as I called out to her silently.) (Make all thoughts and speaking its own paraghraph)


The Creeps ----(The creeps don’t need to be capitalized, it’s a feeling not a thing)


. Have I ever told you I have a habit of hallucinating? It's no biggie, hallucinating can actually be fun if your hallucinating Justin Timberlake giving you a hug, but then when everyone sees you hugging the air it can get kind of awkward for some reason.------(I felt this part was just added for the sake of adding it. Try to find a better place to mention this I guess)


green eyes-------(I would only say eyes. Not Green)


I think the sword deserved a little more description and more story time since it seemed to be pretty important. But that’s up to you. Great chapter so far :)

[RachelReaper]

thank you for taking th time to review this, I really do appreciate it, I will take some of your suggestions and see what I can do. I know your not a fan of characters knowing their in a book, but this particular book, I wanted to do so. It makes the reader feel more involved in the storyline (in my opinion) and I just wanted to do it that way. however, your other suggestions I will take into serious consideration.

[RachelReaper]

oh, just one last teeny comment, Harler is either your style or she's not, her unrelated thoughts to the storyline are just a part of her and her character. And I don't care who you are... some weirdo eyeing a baby stroller is weird...

[RachelReaper]

oh, I forgot, another point. Sorry if it sounds like I'm arguing with you, i'm not trying to, I'm just trying to make my points. About what you said earlier... why wouldn't there be a baby in a stroller...? There in Wal-Mart.

[Taylor H.]

haha I understand what you are saying but what I meant about the baby stroller was I felt like it was a random comment. Like you never mentioned the stroller before hand so I had to pop into my scenariy when reading it. I also felt it was kind of hard to picture were everyone was in the situation. The background wasnt clear and I feel like you should have all aspects mentioned before they NEED to be. You understand what I mean? Like maybe comment on the mother walking by him and than have her mention he was eyeing the stroller. You see what I mean?

[RachelReaper]

ah... I see. I shall revise later. Sorry, at first I just didn't see what you meant.

[Taylor H.]

haha its ok. I understand :) This is an interesting book. I love the idea behind it. Also, I dont know if its just me or not but if I haddnt read the title of this book I wouldnt have known they were angels. Its manly just because its never really said and then they had syths, which I always associate with Grim Reapers. Again. It might just be me. Great book so far.

[RachelReaper]

Junia, Rycel, and Kalilee have weapons, but Rycel is the only one with a scythe. Harler has a... different battle approach. But I stated it in the prologue they were angels, though maybe I should state it more.

[Taylor H.]

I read the prologue. I guess I just missed it lol sorry. Im reading these chapters out of order from the read requests so I may just be confusing myself. Thanks :)

[deepblue04]

awwh, Harler sounds cute the way she talks, me gusta :D

[AleyshaRosa]

I love how to Harler the whole chase is a game, even though it could mean the destruction of any humans within Wal-Mart. She's always giggling running about like it's nothing new, just another game of hide and seek.
Well done, Harler's mind is truly amusing.
Can't wait for the next chapter =]

[Anonymous Girl]

Wow its good.. But one question.. Is she insane crazy or is she just crazy?
Nice one though.. Keep going :)
100/100

[RachelReaper]

do you think she needs more crazy? Because I'm editing more crazy into it based on what Ellachu said, what do you think?

[Anonymous Girl]

I think that more craziness is needed ;) So yeah continue to add it :)

[RachelReaper]

kk, i just dont want to make it incoherent because of too much crazy..

[Anonymous Girl]

Haha.. Sure :)

[RachelReaper]

its edited again if you want to skim over it for changes

[Anonymous Girl]

Lol sure :)