Live

I thought of this spur of the moment and for some reason liked it :)

Live

I have loved

And yes, I've hated

But who wants to hear me

Say that again?

Bitterness and happiness seem to meld

And you'll never know when

Maybe we don't know for sure

Why you're here until your gone

But as long as I'm standing up

I'm putting all my trump cards down

 

This is what you've been given

So do the best with what you can

Only once you'll walk this Earth

Never knowing when you'll end

So live today like

You won't be alive tomorrow

Because you never know

In five minutes you might have to

Leave everyone behind and go

Author's Note

i literally thought of this in thirty seconds while doing my science hw. So please tell me if you thought it was good or not.

Reviews

[Mary]

So the science teacher in me wonders if the assignment got done? But my inner poet is certain you had some soul writing to do. I like your verse- embrace life, appreciate it and don't waste it, for it could be over sooner than you think. Well said and well penned. (Just a small thing- why your here until your gone- change the your to "you're"

[sheila.j]

So true! I think everyone can relate to this and should live like they might not be here tomorrow

Good job :)

[RachelReaper]

thank you so much for reviewing

[ForeverNever]

"I have loved
And yes, I've hated
But who wants to hear me
Say that again?"
Amen guh.
Haven't we all?
Don't we all constantly think this? or maybe it's just me...hmm...
Anywho, great job again Rachel:]

[Lonely Islander]

Packed full of reality and inspiration...true words spoken in a beautiful way...reaper has amazed me again:-):-):-D.

[Pax]

for 30 seconds well that's really good... the wisdom in this is you have accept life and living it to the fullest... like you cherish every minute every seconds of the day just to live the life no matter what might come bitterness or happiness for the best way is to live through it.....
well written indeed!!!

[RachelReaper]

thank you so much :)

[Castonovia]

Liked it and something we all need to strive by, live life to the fullest and all that jazz before it's gone. Inspiring piece... be the glass half full type of person who takes chances regardless of the ace up their sleeves, think with one overflowing heart all the emotions you can. Well penned indeed :)

[AleyshaRosa]

I like the real of it. The cliche that you made known in the first fer verses of the poem

Live
I have loved
And yes, I've hated
But who wants to hear me
Say that again?

No, no one r e a l l y wants to hear it again, and again and.. etc. Thanks for telling the world that. =P Ahh sweet science class. My best poems always came from the scribbled notes on the side bar of my chemistry homework, and I think yours did too. You didn't over think it.

Well written, Rachel

Koodoos

[Bailey B.]

I liked it. It speaks the truth of life and how you can be here one day, and gone the next.

[Phillitup]

This is good, however, the ending is kind of awkward.

You won't be alive tomorrow

Because you never know

In five minutes you might have to

Leave everyone behind and go

That just doesn't really flow...:)

[David the writer]

Good for the thirty seconds. My advice is to come back, and revise this. It's solid ground work, but for a poem, it's not the best. So the problem is the flow. Finishing a sentance in the begining of another stanza makes the flow weird, kinda awkard. Next thing is I noticed you said your showing possesion when the contraction you're would be better. Another thing is this is just a litte short. I'm not saying that's a bad thing, but it isn't good either. It's okay cause you can't stretch art, and you can't chopp it up into smaller pieces. But sometimes, you can shine light on pieces you never saw before. BUT for working in 30 seconds, this is pretty good