Anorexic thoughts from a Bulimic heart~

“Absence reminds me of all the things I'm not

Silence tells me what I will never be”

Everything about me once vibrant and alive

is dormant

an abyss of wants and needs that are anorexic

Screaming from a throat sliced by reality

fails to change my world

(I have failed me)

Call me a pansy a*s writer if you want

but I want the things that make me so

The dandelions weaved through my hair

making love in the tall grass on hot summers day

Naked in the moonlight with midnights shadows

casting our touches from the void and unto flesh

Looks of love and lust over coffee

the laughter while we fling dog s**t into the

neighbors yard..(because we're so bad-a*s)

I want to be the woman and the girl

(vixen and innocence)

I want to be the first thing you think of in the morning

the last thing makes you rise at night

I don't want to be the secret smile

I want to (be) the smile

To bad all of this life has made my thoughts

on love bulimic

Silence, absence...standing still

waiting to die.

(wanting things I just can't have)

and my Mother's voice from all those

years ago sing to me in a haunting whisper

“Que Sera, Sera,
Whatever will be, will be
The future's not ours, to see
Que Sera, Sera
What will be, will be.”

~An invisible life imprint on my soul~

Reviews

[.]

I like the metaphors you use and I think they say a lot. There's a voice here that's crying out for the things in dreams, for the wants, and for the quenching of a soul that's been malnourished. You did a fine job, but for now, my words escape me on anything further.

I've grown tired of the reviews from others that praise the writer in a way that skirts around the meaning of a poem in order to seduce the writer himself/herself, so I won't do that here. I will only say that I've read some of your work and you are a fine poet.

[OBWhiteHawk]

Damn you are the one whose the good writer. This is way too great to even know where to start. The name itself is genius and it gets better from there. I really like the line
I don't want to be the secret smile
I want to (be) the smile

[Lily Mae]

Thank you.. :) I just have moods and write..lol.. xo

[OBWhiteHawk]

I hear ya.

[Jade]

This poem was really nice to read
So much emotion in it
You truley are a great writer

[Lily Mae]

Thank you Jade..xo :)

[Souladareatease]

Indeed...all Hearts want this- if they are but good eh?
A MOST worthy write Dear Mae
( I remember the song well, sung too:)
THE day will come have Faith...And secret loves...love should always be shone!!!
( I just worked a write on candle light of hope type thing...tried to add a pic...froze...lost it all...2 hours work gone...I loved it...Que Sera Sera...
Not meant for tonight.......
Nice work Mae:)

[Lily Mae]

Thank you Gabe..you know I always treasure your words.. I'm so sorry you lost that write..but maybe it's because something else is in the universe stirring up something bigger :) xo

[Souladareatease]

That's what I was trying to convey to You Dear Mae:) and right back atcha=always-treasured (just odd--candle light of hope---...Your write...others writes.....ALOT of folks feeling the wind blow---- tonight Mae...is an odd one--the days energy has been.....perplexing

[Lily Mae]

I agree.. I think there has been strange energy out there for the last three days.. I'm hoping for a good day tomorrow.. for me and you and everyone :) xo

[Souladareatease]

Yep 3 days....

[Lily Mae]

It's not the full moon.. maybe solar flares?

[Souladareatease]

nope...no solar flares...im at a loss...it happens these lulls and shifts as You know...why's it have to be...I will never know...not down..down.......but its odd and leans too the negatives...ughhh

[David Scott]

Now this is a digression from your usual tone... I realy liked the poetry, but i missed your optimism. I know this is art and I know life is not as perfect as we can dream it to be. You do have the power to defy fate! What will be can be changed by my will. Maybe? Worth the fight though.
"To bad all of this life has made my thoughts on love bulimic"
Perfect line!
We gorge ourselves on the "pleasures" of "love" and then when we find that we have lost our self image we want to vomit out this force that has changed us.
Love is not at fault here. Just as food is not at fault in the bulimic.
Keep loving! Tell Mother you love her too, but that she can keep her advice and watch you change your future.
Love the write dear Lily.
Be well.

[Lily Mae]

This is an older piece and I was in a bit of a mood lol.. I can walk through the dark on some days but live, love, a breathe the light :) xoxo Thank you for your wonderful review.

[. serah .]

. i know that song very well ... and i think that it appears at the perfect point in your poem ... life is a quaint experience ... we all want the same things ... some of us wait ... some of us make do with what comes our way ... i think the trick is to be in the moment and cherish it ... your words cherish many precious moments ... and reach the hearts of all who are reading ... you sing your song soulfully ...

[Kyla H]

This was such a nice and inspiring wri te, I love the work i've read by you.

[screamin'ian]

I feel it

[Eden]

Absolutely beautiful. I love it.

[Samantha ~virginpoet]

wow I think I love you for this it shows what an amazing person you are Im speechless and I wholeheartedly agree with Robbie

100/100