Waiting

This is a short piece that talks about the theme of waiting. The narrative follows the change in the nature of how and what you wait for, from childhood to adulthood.

1. And I would sit, near the front door.

Peeping through the little space beneath the door.

“When was my letter from Hogwarts coming?”

2. There was a lot of noise downstairs. Almost like someone had come home. I woke up and saw Pappa’s tshirt hanging on the drawer. I sprinted out off bed and ran down the stairs to the living room. Amma, Ammachi and Chacha were chatting away to some biscuits and tea.

“Where’s Pappa?”

They gave each other a confused look.

“Pappa’s here! I saw his shirt on the drawer.”

“Oh I just got that shirt to put it to wash. Pappa’s in UAE, he’ll only come in December.”

“I DON’T want to WAIT till then!”

3. “Catch that!”

I went skipping behind the milkweed seed that was drifting in the wind.

One leap and a clasp!

Yes!

I slowly opened the palm of my hands and in the middle lay a white ball of fur.

“Make a wish!”

And I made my wish. But now the wait begins.

4. My wish came true!

“Amma has a baby? Is it a brother?!”

“Kunju can you go sit in your room? No it’s not a baby. She’s just sick.”

But I was sure it was a baby. Finally I’ll get a baby brother to play with.

5. My grandpa took me to the ICU.

Amma was just sick.

It was not a baby.

I just smiled at her.

“What happened?’ Amma asked

I just shook my head. Maybe some other time if I prayed harder, God would bless my mother a baby.

6. “Amma has A BABY!”

“Is it a boy?”

“I don’t want a sister. I want a baby brother”

“ I’m going to have so much fun!”

“Only 4 months left for him to come!

“What?”

“He’s not coming?”

“Why?”

“He was sick? Well then why couldn’t you SAVE HIM? ”

7. I don’t like waiting at airports.

But I’m going to UAE. I’m going to stay with Amma and Pappa. And I’m going to be in fifth grade. I’ll be joining a new school, LPS. So I think it’s all right waiting.

8. November 29 2007.

5:24 pm

And there he was. A pink little thing wrapped in a pink towel. His eyes shut close his lips shifting a little and his fingers clenched tight.

My baby brother was finally here.

9. It was the first time the guys from 8^th grade performed a dance for the annual day. Everyone of us were cheering and shouting. There was Sai, Pranay, Adithya, Joseph and …. who’s that?

“Aqil”

Oh.

Aqil took the same school bus I was in after school hours. And so evenings were the only time I could get to see him.

I would wait eagerly the whole day.

I would make my way through the crowd and stand close to where he was and pretend it was not part of the plan at all.

My flimsy first love.

I would root for him even when he was clumsy with the basketball or even when he made fail attempts at football. I thought he was the coolest boy around. And all of this I did in secret. I never spoke to him but I always admired him from afar. And I hoped that someday we would notice me. And I hoped that he would fall in love with me too. But I never had the patience to wait. And so one day I professed my undying love for him.

Maybe I should have just waited.

10. I kept waiting.

I was waiting for love.

I met my ex.

I thought my wait was over.

“Not really”

So this wasn’t love after all?

“What you were doing….Ah how do I put it Linda…You were just playing games with him.”

How are you so sure?

“Because love is hard work. It’s not sitting around and waiting for things to happen the way you want it. “

But…

“He doesn’t even know you as much as I know you.”

Yeah of course! You’re my best friend.

“Yeah I’m your best friend.”

11. “But Linda,

I want to fall in love with you. “

Then what’s holding you back from it?

I don’t know if I can wait for you.

12. I waited for his message to pop up on my screen.

I smiled.

I had a different notification tune set for him. Maybe I could wait for him after all.

13. December has always been my favourite month. Maybe it’s the whole festive mood about it that makes me fall in love with the month. There’s only 3 months left to December.

There are only 3 months left for him, to come to my city.

“How long has it been?”

9 years ?

“Haha. You were in Sapphire house back in LPS. The artist.”

You remember which house I was in?!

“I take notice of things that matter”

Like me being in Sapphire house?

“You could say”

Stupid boy

When the world around me was cold, he was the warm wave that washed over me.

Some people are worth the wait.

14. Sometimes you wait so much in your life that by the end of it you almost forget what you were actually waiting for.