First Date Blues

First Date Blues

A Poem by Brian F. Lockard

First date blues


I realize it has been a while

Still wearing rags

I’ve been chasing after things…

Riches, Dragons

A five-figure salary, Sinatra’s voice, pure Michigan water, high quality p***y

Ginger ale to wash it all down

Something sweet

I once could drink from the bitter, fermented fruits of life

And not even leap from branch to branch at the taste

But now…

I’ve put a quarter into the machine

And now begging for three more

That fat kid is still in there,


Wheezing and waddling around

He will not allow me to enjoy myself

Trust nobody, he says

Be careful, risks are for degenerate gamblers

Fortune favors the bold, and the bold still die

And they die young

Stay angry, stay sharp

Grow old…

I know he is right

Even when I look into the eyes

Of the next girl

The next void of hope

Still I ignore him

And she sits there

Brushing her legs against mine,

With her high quality p***y

Telling me it will all be okay

She would still be sitting across from me

Even with the acne across my face

The beer gut before I ever tried any beer

My man tits erect and chafing at the idea

But it’s a funny thing…

That slovenly little boy

Who nobody wanted

Is doing all right for himself now

Instead of them lying to avoid him,

They now lie to earn his favor

To pay for their Moscow mules…

Am I angry?

Not quite...

The opposite of angry

The fat kid learns the true nature of them all

Early on

This is a blessing

Not a curse

Better to suffer as a child

Than to suffer as an adult

Many thanks

To the heartless angels

Here's me, toasting to the devil

© 2018 Brian F. Lockard

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Added on September 23, 2017
Last Updated on February 21, 2018
Tags: fat, weight loss, motivation, drive, health, fitness, dark, funny, poems, comedy, prose, short stories, Bukowski


Brian F. Lockard
Brian F. Lockard

Chicago, IL

Poet, budding novelist, student, etc. Wish me luck TWITTER: @RealBFL more..