Loner...

It is a long poem, please have patience to read it till the last line.

I have not seen you socialing,
I asked this man one day.
Who always talked of love,
But in a melancholic way.

On asking, he told me,
The story of his life.
Joyful sagas of love,
That always gave him strife.

At first I fell in love,
With a girl I saw in dreams.
Blessed with average beauty,
But her virtues were supreme.

Humble on yonder side,
Stood I with a red rose.
Forgetful of our standards,
Just ready to propose.

She ditched me and my heart,
started to ache a bit.
Then came in life,
A lady with, quick witt.

Her cheerful attitude,
Rid me from my sorrow.
We liked each other secretely.
Confession? Left for tomorrow.

And when the day arrived,
I thought I'd make her mine,
Our ways got deviated.
Guess we wasted too much time.

As my wounds started to deepen,
And I almost lost the hope.
Love struck my life again.
I got no time to cope.

An artist understood,
Another artist's pain.
Friendship was in hand,
And there was more to gain.

When it was safe to say we were,
more than friends... You know!
That hippocrate fell for looks,
And left me for a foe.

A move made too quick,
And a moment streched too long.
Disolved the pain of my mind,
In first two verses of this song.

Diabolic was the blow,
That fell last on my heart crying.
Thrice unlucky in love,
I was tired of trying.

Not every girl is wrong,
While I am always right.
This is a false impression,
I cannot have this pride.

Tears sparkled in hs eyes,
As said this the poor mourner.
I was meant to be like this,
For I am a lifelong loner...

Author's Note

It is the first draft and first attempt at poem that is long and tells a story.
Any suggestions for betterment are welcomed. :-)

Reviews

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

I just reread this, i wanted to leave another review because its well worth reading till the end, and well worth another review :)
I love this story, about all the loves of a mans life, and every story about every woman he feel in love with.
How did you come up with this?
Still sad and heartbreaking piece though.
Amazing write, gonna add it to my favorites :)

[Penny]

Tenkew cimmy. It is your review that has not only motivated me but made me feel having achieved something. And about the inspiration... hmm.. that would be another thing I talked about in my e-mail. Ha..

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

You have already emailed me? i haven't gotten it hun.
Your welcome :)

[Penny]

No I havn't. Network is very weak. But I'll e-mail you really soon. I can't wait to talk :-)

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

i cant wait either, but i will have to get back to your email tommrow, as much as i dont want to go to bed i should. Its 5:30 am :P Im such a night owl, ima get up soooo late tommrow haha, i wonna stay up and write all night

[cycy]

I was meant to be like this,
For I am a lifelong loner...

wow this is a sad yet beautiful poem wellwritten dear and we can all relate to the story of love lost and passion faded i enjoyed it its long yet well worthh the read xoxo

[Penny]

Thanks for the review. I am really glad to see that the poem is still being loved.

[Tate Morgan]

How nice it is to find a fellow writer who aspires to thew art of rhyme and meter

[Penny]

Thanks tate. It was actually quite hard for me to write this peice. I have another poem though which is even more well structured but it is yet to be published on this site. Thanks for the review.

[Tate Morgan]

You are welcome I know all about how hard it is to write good works.They take time and study and inspiration The thing about rhyme and meter is that if done right The complicated works seem to roll off the tongue with ease and no one is the wiser about how hard they are to create

[Penny]

Exactly. I started this poem from the last two stanzas and made it this. So yeah.. it was hard time takingand because i hd to incorporate a story it really drained my imagination.

[Tate Morgan]

oh my god I write all of mine backwards starting with the end then the rest lol

[Tate Morgan]

you do this just like I do making the end the best of the poem it cinches the rest of the poem together

[Penny]

Hmm.. it does work.

[Vandana Sharma]

It is perfect. I have met such persons in my life and their hearts cry a lot.

[Penny]

Tenkew. And as you said you have met these persons you must know that simple they are. I just hope you did your own little bit to make them happy.

[Talesha]

I will remember this poem until I die! Beautifully written and so sad too.It's sad to pass life without ever finding a soulmate.Up until this poem,I used to think there was someone for everybody.Guess everyone's fate is different.Excellent poetry.Thank you for sharing. :)

[Penny]

Perhaps you have said everything which every poet likes to hear. I'm thanking you beyond words, though I have made you believe that something this sad occurs, which I don't like as a person I like that you noticed every detail of this piece. Thnx a lot again..

[Talesha]

Not a problem,you are a wonderful artist.Also,I do think you can be a famous author.With words so effortlessly beautiful,you already have the work done. Keep the faith alive,your dreams can and will come true.

[Penny]

Having said dat u made my lyf. If you would be kind enough could you help me getting published and be a professional writer.

[Talesha]

Aww,I wish I could..how can I help?

[Coyote Poetry]

"Diabolic was the blow,
That fell last on my heart crying.
Thrice unlucky in love,
I was tired of trying."
Love is never fair. I learn the hard way. Allow love to come to you. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Penny]

Tekew coyote. And it was really sweet of you to be able to see the emotion with which i wrote but just sayin' what does it matter if you give love a chance but love doesn't give you one.

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

*socialing - socializing
*Quotation mark for the narration of the man (from 3rd stanza to the last)

Love the concept. Nice rhyme scheme. Keep it up!

[Penny]

Tenkew. And those were some clever ideas indeed that you gave. Thnx agaiin.

[Sami Khalil]

"Tears sparkled in hs eyes,
As said this the poor mourner.
I was meant to be like this,
For I am a lifelong loner..."

Two stories of your life that are different but with lessons to learn and share. Sad but realistic and it happens to so many people...A great write...:)...............

[Penny]

Tenkew Sami. I'm obliged.

[Sami Khalil]

You are welcome...:)...............

[Penny]

:-) :-) :-)

[Sami Khalil]

^^~^^ :>)....................

[Saddam]

you write beautifully, as me this is awsome because i have faced it... but life is on.