I am one, I am All

I am not the firefly that glows in the dark, 

Nor am I the rabbit that skitters across the park,

I am not one, nor am I all, 

I am not afraid to fall.

 

Instead I fear the possibilities, I fear the things that mean most to me.

I am scared to achieve, to get all of my wildest dreams. 

Silly it is, for one to be afraid to receive what they want. 

But I am scared of what that change will bring 

I am scared ill never hear the phone ring-

I am scared to lose but I am scared to gain 

I guess I don’t want to go back to the pain. 

I want to explore and I want to see

But I fear the things I will find inside of me. 

My fear goes on for miles, I want to enjoy the safety for a while

But I find no greatness in my safety 

For not a damn thing will ever feel safe to me. 

Don’t you see the contradiction I’ve become? 

Can no longer be kept under your thumb, 

But cannot bear for the sound of my own drum.

To make the noise and shatter the illusion,

Would be such an intrusion, on my mind and my soul. 

But that is the only way I’ll ever be whole. 

Reviews

[Gaurav]

Love the poem. It is a beautiful description of contradictions that arise within and force a person to pause before working for dreams. Voices inside that are the result of fear and other negative thoughts burns a person and take away positive virtues. It is only fear of any kind that obstruct us. Good write up. Thanks for sharing :)

[ANTO]

What a conun-DRUM - (sorry couldnt resist that MT )
Underachieving is a skill in itself - a skill that not many are proud of but a skill that has been honed from we were kids and we learned that achieving can bring with it so much pain and hurt (eg bullying). Therefore we create the underachiever persona to protect the real 'us'.
In time the real 'us' gets lost in the underachievers clothing and begins to feel suffocated by that suit of armour that once protected so well.
Its takes guts to throw the armour off and bare the real 'us' to the world. I still struggle with the clasps on my armour and sometimes, nay most times I relent to staying inside it.
Your insight makes that task all the more difficult. You see what needs done but fear doing it.
I wish you well.

[Nora]

Very emotionally resonating and I found myself relating to this a great deal.
A beautiful poem, thank you for sharing. :)

[Maskedthoughts]

Thank you so much!!

[alifeacoustic]

To fear change, and see that it can bring a downside as well as the upside, is a very good place to be in my humble opinion. It shows that you can fly, despite fearing heights, can overcome, despite being overcome and shows a depth of appreciation that not everything is in our own hands.
I thought of the phrase a beautiful contradiction while reading this, but then realise I might be mistaking it for a song lyric, I think it was a wonderful contradiction.
If we didn't have doubt, we would all try to fly from the highest cliff, but some prefer the safety of taking off from the ground first.
Thank you for sharing this wonderful and thought provoking write with us.

[Maskedthoughts]

Thanks i really wasn't sure about this piece, loved hearing your thoughts!

[alifeacoustic]

You are most welcome. And thank you.