Trapped in Darkness

Exaggerated poem based on my anger and sadness after a fight with my family.

Tears and I are familiar;

In fact, we’ve become friends.

Both trapped in darkness,

Mixed with emotions

We can’t explain.

Hot tears roll down my face,

With thunder close behind.

I gasp for air

And beg for the pain to cease.

Torture may be better than this.

Author's Note

Please note that the gasping for air is because I get choked up when I cry.

I'd love to hear thoughts on this poem.

Reviews

[Sseoni]

I thought that this was a wonderful poem! Powerful and definintely emotional! I feel as though you expressed your feelings very well! Amazing poem! :D

[Bhavya Kaushik]

This was short yet very powerful and strong..
The structure was very appealing and your words touched my soul.
Great work!

[Joe]

This was really powerful and emotional.

[Nautili]

you have the ability to convey your feelings in such a way that the reader feels as though they are there. Good job and thank you for my review, as well. "Hot tears run down my face, with thunder just behind." love that line, can hear you crying loudly----what a cool comparison!

[unspokenguilt]

ooh family fights...they can be bitter just had one this saturday.
Nice Poem :) elyssa

[All faded blue]

Well done. Like the "trapped in darkness, mixed with emotions we can't explain" More or less says it all for anyone who has a strong difference of point of view! Good job.

[MIA ST. PAUL]

I'm sorry about the fight with your family, But I can feel your pain thru this poem.

very good