Why You

Why You

A Poem by Melany Garcia
"

You hurt me as you slowly fade away why me? why do I always end up hurt?

"
Days have gone by
I'm waiting as if it's a long line
I know your the right one
But we met at the wrong time
It's not funny when your the one that the jokes on
I can't do this 
I see it in your eyes 
You don't feel it inside
I need love
So why all of a sudden you trying to end this
relationship you started with me
I swear I see it all
I'm well aware i'm speaking to a ghost
Am I in love with you or am I so used to you
I'm done with faking
Your losing me
I'm feeling alone
When I should've known
I'm Guess its time to say goodbye
I'm so tired of all your lies
I can't do this thing anymore
I see it in your eyes
Your not good at faking it
So I guess it's time to say goodbye...





© 2017 Melany Garcia



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Featured Review

This poem has potential. I like the theme, can relate to the theme, but the expression and craft of the message needs a bit of work....also, there are certain grammatical errors, but that's the least of your worries. As much as there is power in this, it's kind of undermined by the fact that there are unnecessary repetitions (which with the right tweak could be turned into good repetitions), and lack of musicality. I would definitely recommend playing with this a bit, for I did enjoy it, and I'm not specifying these "issues" because it's bad.....I'm doing so because I see potential in this, and I want to help make it better.

Good start!

Posted 4 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Melany Garcia

4 Months Ago

Thank you for the feedback I truly appreciate it :)
emipoemi

4 Months Ago

with pleasure.



Reviews

This poem has potential. I like the theme, can relate to the theme, but the expression and craft of the message needs a bit of work....also, there are certain grammatical errors, but that's the least of your worries. As much as there is power in this, it's kind of undermined by the fact that there are unnecessary repetitions (which with the right tweak could be turned into good repetitions), and lack of musicality. I would definitely recommend playing with this a bit, for I did enjoy it, and I'm not specifying these "issues" because it's bad.....I'm doing so because I see potential in this, and I want to help make it better.

Good start!

Posted 4 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Melany Garcia

4 Months Ago

Thank you for the feedback I truly appreciate it :)
emipoemi

4 Months Ago

with pleasure.

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Added on July 19, 2017
Last Updated on July 19, 2017

Author

Melany Garcia
Melany Garcia

Lake Worth, FL



About
I love to write poetry It's a way to express how i truly feel without voice To show the pain and love i feel constantly Sometimes i think sadness is my satisfaction.. more..

Writing
Heart Heart

A Poem by Melany Garcia