Happenings in the town ( this is the revised version of Lights)

Im continuing to play with ideas, words rymes rythm and trying to follow the likes of Tom Waits, P Smith and many other similarities;))

Blind man with a guide dog-

Fell down the stairs

There he saw Devil in disguise

Felt that something isnt right

Devil took him home for He's wife

Guide dog alone prowling in the night

Some tell me that he might bite

Town church under bright lights

Angels wept when Jesus died-

Cried- since noone else cared

All sinners danced all night-

Didnt stop till the very first morning light 

Little granny went to a shop-

Got home then just dropped

Died because she got groped

Her son went and bought a  rope

Everyone thought he was  a dope

Down at their funeral, everyone cried-

Lied, some more may have died

Shock of sadness moment of madness

Once by the table began to dance

Wasting what was their only chance

To beg mercy for their  souls

Quickly turned into dirty  ghouls.

   

Reviews

[R.E. Ray]

You certainly convey the darker side of humanity in this piece, at least from my perspective. I see some truths in society today, so I'm sure others will identify with some of your words here.

Based on your comments above, it appears you're still working on this piece. So, you might consider restructuring it. It doesn't flow as well as it might, and the stanzas seem a bit disconnected. Still, you have a strong theme and emotions in this piece.

[merit]

Thank you Rob
And yes when I posted it I was still a bit all over the place but I will rework it and then re post it up again tomz:))