Vibrant Place

Inside my head,

The world is a vibrant place.

Coloured, crazed spirals;

Spin out of control.

An octopus opens a door,

A different colour for each tentacle.

He walks upside down,

Along the wall.

One little fish swims out of a painting,

And a mermaid combs her long, kelpish hair.

A kite flies down,

And rocks sink up.

A mirror bars you from seeing,

And iron bars are yielding.

The little me shouts and screams,

But all is at peace.

Inside their heads,

The world is monochrome and grey.

Straight black lines zigzag,

In a disorderly, organised fashioned.

Trust the adults,

They take the fun out of everything

She said,

As she drank her cup of earl grey,

Sitting on the ceiling.

Reviews

[cbritto6]

I don't know much about poetry, but i liked this! Especially the last stanza and the last line. It all paints an Alice and Wonderlandy word picture.

[Saria Lon]

I like this! Great flow, structure, meaning. I think we have a similar writing style - this reminded me of some poems I've written.. the slight surrealism, shapes, perspective. I understand where you were coming from in this poem. It's nice to read this and "get" it right away. Thank you, keep writing!!! :)

[Maddi]

Thank you very much!(:

[Warrior]

Very awesome read. I like how your writing flows together, to make me visualize everything that's going on. Many stories on here do that, and that's why most of the stories I read on here are good because you all are very talented and gifted, I visualized everything as I was reading it. Great writing. On to another topic. I have a website where I post my short stories, and blogs on. I also have ads on the website. I was wondering if you can go to my website, and click on any ad. you don't have to buy anything, I promise you won't get any viruses, all it is is google adsense on my website, and the more clicks on the ads, the more it helps grow my website. My website is bwlawson.com I appreciate it, that you would be taking part in helping my craft, business, product, and brand grow. Thank you!