Heart Break: The ultimate act of selfishnes

There's something familiar about loss, Something that turns those of us with even the stoutest of hearts into content and sabotaged creatures.

It is a strange state of mind, yet one we always seem to find ourselves in. 

It is here that those sweet waves of apathy we know all too well wash over us, and where we found out exactly how comfortable we, as a species, are with disappointment.

The abyss, stare for too long into it, and it also will stare into you.

I for one, savor those moments, When all the bullshit that grownups aren't supposed to fall prey to becomes validated.

I have always had a tendency to turn any sort of unpleasant event in my life into an existential crisis from which my psyche had no hope of returning unscathed, and, to a point, I don't think I am any different from any else in that regard.

In fact, I would consider it one of the more universal tropes of the human experience, because, everyone understands that one emotion.

The ironic one, that takes the ugliest of the human spirit, and turns it into the most beautiful.

I love this girl so much that it hurts me, and I learned a long time ago that there existed almost no chance of us ever being together, myself in Naval Special Warfare, Her being a Visual Arts major at NYU.

While I understand these facts, I could never accept them.

Guy loves a girl who feels the same, but the guy fucked it up.

So cliche, yet, I feel as if I am the most unlucky thing in the universe, Reality itself conspiring against me.

I would rather live life miserable with the hope of being with her, than live life with a gouge in my heart.

That is the irony of being heartbroken.

Men have killed themselves because of it, and more than one s****y song written.

Yet we put ourselves through it, finding it far preferable to the alternative of not getting exactly what we want.

If we would consider the false reality of living in the fantasy world that we chase after true enough, then I guess heartbreak is as valid as the brain claims it to be.

In the end, we do get exactly what we want.

And I'm a selfish b*****d