Intersection

Let me love you in the morning

When the world is still childish

While my thoughts are still burning

with life… While I’m being selfish.

 

A lost hope is a wandering star

Waiting to be found…

When a memory is nothing but a scar

When the silence makes no sound….

 

Another woman at the horizon...

The blackest blasphemy…

And now my thoughts are full of poison

Because I know it’s not meant to be.

 

 

 

 

 

Reviews

[ANTO]

This is a very good write Ana, the first stanza is to die for - again it alone could be one of those Wise tumblr posters
- the second I felt would be more in keeping with the rest of the poem if you had kept it as personal to the narrator as you did in the first and third stanzas with perhaps, 'My lost hope ..' instead of 'A lost hope'

- the third - what can i say but 'meeeeaaaiow' lol
Cool write Ana (love that name) !!!!

[Ana B.]

:) your words make me giddy lol, thank you for your suggestion my dear friend,
love your reviews ;)

[Tate Morgan]

Very well done Ana The flowing storyline the idea the ending all mesh well

[Ana B.]

Thank you very much Tate :)

[Tate Morgan]

You are welcome Ana

[anonymous]

Gorgeous! You did such a beautiful job with this poem! I enjoyed it immensely. Please continue writing! :)

[Ana B.]

Thank you A :)

[Roshan Nair]

When the world is still childish - Im in love with this metaphor you have used Ana. A day is like the flowers that bloom at dawn and die by night.. much like the day and all that it shows us. and the next brings the same and the cycle continues. THis line itself can render a poem to itself! i really liked the piece and the anguish you showed especially in the last stanza. It was so apt to closing the piece with a climax that is such. Cheers! :)

[Ana B.]

:) Cheers Roshan, your words make me smile. Thank you.

[RAOrourke]

Well done with your poem...I enjoyed the way your poem flowed with the emotion and story... I could feel the hopefulness in the beginning and feel the heartbreak and anger at the end!

Another woman at the horizon...
The blackest blasphemy…
And now my thoughts are full of poison
Because I know it’s not meant to be

[Ana B.]

Well, it's not from my personal experience....so i tried to paint it as close as i could get....thank you very much for reading it :)

[Shane Mohamed]

A poem of love and jealousy; two dangerous things. I liked the concoction. Great rhyming scheme as well. Wonderfully executed. Thank you for sharing.

[Ana B.]

Thank you so much fro stopping by.

[Lyndy]

I love this poem! ;) It's very well written and beautiful.

[Ana B.]

Thank you very much :)

[~]

first stanza - you identify your youthful vigor to that selfishness of a child (and whoever has had toddlers, knows how true that is LOL)
second stanza - night falls; alas there is no midday, it is all gone ..
third one - full of dark and negative thoughts, that are even dark for the night. Very emotional, really powerful, concise and rich.
Let me lend you some skittles for goodness sake Ana :)

[Ana B.]

ha ha :) be my guest , thank you for the insight.

[AaronFreitas]

Built me up and knocked me down! haha awesome poem... hate when we realize something isn't meant to be

[Ana B.]

true, but who knows....what doesn't kill us.....you know the rest :)
Thank you Aaron.

[Raja Anjana Kothapalli]

"A lost hope is a wandering star
Waiting to be found…
When a memory is nothing but a scar
When the silence makes no sound…."

Deep and heart-touching write, Ana B.! Loved it! Thanks for sharing it.☺

-Anjana

[Ana B.]

Thank you for your sweetness Anjana :)