Strange Pits of Fashion Have I Known

An apology...To all those that got away. (structure is important here)

Kaitlin:

We met in college back when
We were both freshmen. I
Never tried to do too much
Beyond comparing notes, but you,
You grew very interested and
You called me every day
While I led you on until
You'd slowly fade away.
So soon you would move on
And get yourself someone else
But this raised no alarm
Inside of my head.

Then he died, her man,
The guy who took that vacant space
I neglected to pursue, the pain
Of loss was written on her face.
While all her friends I'd known
Were writing eulogies,
She refused to change her status
And admit that she was free,
While I tried to accept
That she would never love me now
Her life has changed, well she has
Probably forgotten me anyhow.

Susan:

Last time I saw you was way back
When we used to roam the streets
Drinking in our playful youth;
You would appear with your friends
And you'd seen me around school
So when you said hello you would
Plant a kiss upon my lips,
Nothing serious, just a kiss.
And one night I had went out
My last night in the town
You planted one more kiss
Your last, and then I left.

Soon I went away to school
And began to miss the nights
When just saying hello
Could leave me satisfied.
I know I never told her
How each kiss made me feel
But I can't help but think
That if I had, this may be real;
If she could have been something
More than just a flinch,
A second of euphoria
That faded in a cinch.

Megan:

At first I was surprised at how
You would respond to my pursuit
You were beautiful, and I felt weird
Even being able to be seen
Beside you, even if you got too drunk
And often disappeared, the night
Would always end with you back
Beside me saving the last dance.
Then summer came and we were distant
And my paranoia grew, if the
Last dance wasn't mine, then who
Was glorified with such a gift?
-I might have gotten pretty mad
That night you did not return my call,
I said some hurtful things and now
You want no part of me at all!

Her eyes are piercing
Her hair on fragile shoulders rests,
And just her picture makes me
Feel a strong sense of regret.
I want to ask her how she's been
And see if she's still mad
But I know she won't be coming back
Because I hurt her pretty bad.
And she's miles away from me
That's the way she wants to stay,
But I cannot shake this belief
That she'll return some day.

Lauren:

When I met you, I remember
I didn't quite fall for you, I didn't
Care at that time to really get involved,
But something hit me late that night
That insisted you were worth
The pursuit, so I asked you to come back out
And you declined! But I was persistent
Spouting charming phrases that went
Nowhere you could see them coming true
And soon I got the hint and left,
Left you to find somebody else
And you left too with the same thought in mind.

At night I see her out
And we exchange hellos
But I start to think about
How she feels down below,
Beneath the friendly small talk
In which we must now engage,
If she can still remember
The words I used to say;
In place of "hi, how are you?"
Were gaudy compliments-
'Does she still see me saying them?'
But she probably did forget.

Ashley:

I had thought your friend was joking
When she said that you were free
And looking for a man, so I
Told her I was willing to
Give you a shot, and she
Set us on a date!  But I
Never showed. I was
Busy at home watching the
Yankees game!  So you
Met our other friend from there
And I silently watched as you guys
Grew into a five-year love affair.

I caught up with her briefly
When her birthday rolled around,
Bought a couple drinks and then
We spoke of our old town.
Then she danced away
To be with her man
And I marveled at the years
That passed with slight of hand.
What if I had never stayed
To see the Yankees play;
There will always be a game on
But there's only one Ashley.

Samantha:

We met when I was twenty, you sat
Next to me while I was
Fixing up my education at a
Community College that I dreaded, where
You had come as well to
Fix up what went wrong and you
Had a movement that suggested
If I listened to you speak we may
Establish something meaningful together;
But then you fell astray and stopped attending class,
While I had a one night dream of us
Together in a perfect world.

Her new hair color's blond,
And its grown long and strait,
She's even got a baby now
Shared with her brand new mate.
I can see her hold it close
Exploiting all her charm,
Rocking the child gently
Within her sturdy arms.
I start to see she did not know
The future I wish I had said.
Seems all her subtle movements
Danced only in my head.

Jen:

How we first started talking, I don't
Exactly recall now, I know
We were intoxicated and
Something drew me towards you
And your friends at the bar.
I bought a couple drinks for us
And then we settled down
You said that I was really nice
And then we briefly shared
A kiss which I can still feel,
Then I said goodbye and left
Never to return.

At night I see her waiting
For me to call her back
To tell her how I'm doing,
And make sure she's still intact.
That's if she still remembers
Our one enchanted night,
And when I think about it
I highly doubt she might.
So I stare into the faces
Of others when I'm out,
Hoping she'd recognize me
But if she ever will, I doubt.

Author's Note

Hope this gets everyone into the Valentines Day spirit...Again, its all format at this point, my wording is entirely tentative. Names have been changed to protect the subjects..enjoy! Oh and I know its far from perfect.

One more thing..the title is a play on the title of a William Wordsworth poem, "Strange Fits of Passion Have I known"

Reviews

[theunionisloud]

First of all, I love the wordplay of the title! So clever.

I love the idea of this poem.. I can imagine that it probably felt great to get this all out. To write of all these lovers past, and then to publish it. I commend you.

I also really love the form. You give us some background on each girl, and then turn your remaining thoughts into poetry. The fact that your lingering thoughts are poetry is sorts poetic in and of itself.... all you have left of these women is whim.

Obviously, this poem is about your past love life, which... you can't really change right now. However, I would have liked to see it end a little more conclusively. There are sections for each of these girls, and it seems like you still think about each of them. This poem would have come full circle if you hammered out your feelings for the last girl a little more (*assuming* she was all that more important in your life). I feel like if you had written about how you miss her most of all, or instead left the end for someone who you know will always be in your life.. it would have felt more conclusive. Without ending on either extreme, we're sorta left wondering what's up with you now. (Nosy, I know).

Great, great poem... really original in form.

[Neva Flores Smith - Cha..]

I love all of the different characters you have here in this well penned piece. Very well done my friend.

[Nothing Personal]

strange but real and robust. I like this kind of looking back and how life can be so variable at times with people who came close and people who went far. It's a wonderful dedication to your close brushes and it's a nice read..Well done.

[William Maisonave]

nostalgic regret...thats the feeling that surfaces when I read this fantastic piece.looking back and wondering what could've been. You know I love rhyme so big thumbs up

[AlisshalovesBrandon]

i really liked this one, its my favorite one of yours so far.

[trainwreck]

Really nice write. It was also tasteful of you to change the names.

[Zoe Jay]

Wow, this is a really dedicated write. It is very well thought out and constructed. The poem has the same rhythm and flow throughout, which binds it together, yet the verse for each girl very much has it's own feel and mood. I love the way you bring out the delicacy and conflicts of feelings in these situations - a mixture of resignation and regret, curiosity and hope. There is also an overall self-deprecating, almost self-mocking tone which makes this poem very likable. I love how you have portrayed what drew you to each girl, in such a unique way, there is a real appreciation here of the true people under the skin, and that is awesome. I like how, while you have used a few small details of their appearances to add color to the poem, you refrain from in-depth physical descriptions of each girl. This poem is about the people, not the skin, and that gives it real beauty. Excellent write, very well done and a new favorite!!

[Nimbus Thread]

Women as fashion....interesting way of putting it. As a confession or an admission I enjoyed the conversation, the immediate casual form. Now I know what goes on in a guys head...well not all of them. lol

[Magdelena]

Now this is something.. I so love the way you brought this forth. Very challenging piece I must say. Intertwining all within each, making individuals into one piece yet streaming them along like a story-line. Not only clever but rarely done.. I say bravo to you on this. i saw a few pieces in books I read, done in this format and you hit it bulls-eye me pal.

Whoo Hoo!

Mags xx

[Narnie]

It is VERY brave, haha. I have written about past boyfriends in the past but have had to disguise them heavily, just in case. It's a strange one that Valentine's day makes us revisit those past loves in our minds... almost like a day where its alright just to take a little trip over it all and wonder what they are doing with their day. Get those tentative words into definites, haha...

[Bette]

regrets and lost love. Well done!