An Ode, to the comtemporary mother

As spoken by a highly underpaid, and over dramatic, Shakespeare actor. Sir. Rubbius Wallace ButtocksofFriday

Dear Lady,

Does thy strain of thy arms, bare to much weight.

Do such fires of hell contain upon the chalice in your hand?

Does the contents,

of your Starbucks Triple Mocha.....with skim milk for thy has demand upon a calorie count,

be too worrisome to bare?

My lady,

Do speeds of flight such as not seen since Pan, the Archangel Micheal,

And to Crash across the barries of time upon speeds as delivered by God,

Mean, thy can not use a simple blinker,

when changing lanes?

Shall I interpret you finger,

As being in the wrong?

Sweet charming lady,

Is the industry of trade bring such a curse of Malice,

to put to contest of Banshees whaling across the moors,

How dos thou command the heavens,

when demanding texting charges be in retreat,

for this was not on the 'Friends and Family plan'!

What horrors of spiteful curses,

what black satanic signs,

or false gods will you pray too,

when Twittering your anger in the Verizon parking lot??????

Most honored lady,

Does thy command the mountains of Heaven moved,

For the Sea's to be turned to stone,

The tree's to become flames,

if this light does not turn Green????????

Slightly annoying, not much of a tipper, wears things four sizes too small..............lady,

Does thy remain privy,

Is thy true,

On what pillar of Olympus,.

Do you get the f**k off?

Was my blinker not flashing,

or was your text that important????????????????????????????

 

Reviews

[Russell]

Hmm. Is this some sort of faux-Shakespearean joke? I don't read a lot of poetry, but offhand I cannot recall reading a poem worse than this one. A "poet" who thinks "Contents" is singular, who doesn't know the difference between "bare" (to make naked) and "bear' (to support) or between "wailing" and "whaling" (or do banshees command whaling ships across the moors?), who cannot spell "Michael," who thinks that "tree's" and "sea's" are plural), really must go back to the beginning and work on the basics before he can write anything worth reading.

[Kiara]

Whoa, back off. It has some errors but it's still a good poem.

[Stella]

WOW!! This is one of the coolest and most creative poems I've ever read. This poem definitely deserved first place in the satire contest. Great job!!!

[Shelley Holt-Lowrey]

LOL. DANG! 'Bout time someone around here started taken the women to task on stuff. I am SO tired of being yelled at for only bashing the men on the head! Thank you from the bottom of my Forever 21 Shoppin, SUV drivin', Pedicure-Gettin' Soccer-Team-Mom heart. (None of those things are remotely true, but it sounded way better than what I truly drive, where I shop, yada yada).

Dude! This is MY lane!!!

[MoriartyMesa]

Nah my dear Venus, learn to use the god damn blinker.

[Renée]

lol Love it ! ( :

[Brittni]

Very direct and a great read.

cute really, I like this, quite intriguing.

[Coyote Poetry]

I agree with the anger in this poem. I dodge people daily doing everything but driving. I like your directness in this poem. I will tell people. Get off the cell phone or get off the road. No weakness in this outstanding poem.
Coyote

[Kuhr Gred]

:) a letter! KEEP IT UP!! Great write ;)