Have you Ever

Have you Ever

A Poem by MissMisunderstood
"

Just a little poem about different things you might feel.

"
Have you ever wished upon a star,
To forget the future, present, and past?
To leave the world and where you are
And find endless peace within you at last?

Have you ever dreamed of darkness,
Black and ruthless, like the night?
Or of joy, and happiness,
And everlasting light?

Have you ever shed a tear,
Felt it stream down your cheek?
Burning with sorrow, or fear,
Far from the solace which you seek?

Have you ever felt the sun,
The light glinting off your eyes?
The warmth dusting your face,
And the pleasure in seeing it rise?

Have you ever laughed with delight,
Heard the ring piercing your ears?
And realized you've uncovered a treasure,
To bring ecstasy throughout your years.  

- MissMisunderstood





© 2017 MissMisunderstood



Author's Note

MissMisunderstood
Hello everyone. This is an original poem that I just wrote. I was thinking about some different feelings and suddenly starting rhyming. I hope you like it.

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Reviews

Not bad--- it reads well and is quite lovely, lyrical-- the last 2 lines leave one thinking, which is always good in a poem.

Posted 1 Year Ago


MissMisunderstood

1 Year Ago

Thank you. I try to make my writing style very unique.
Hello, thank you for entering your priceless poem on my poetry contest... First of all I really like the concept of this write, most of us hardly see the beauty that lies in front us and we look for the beauty that hardly matters... Your poem is a sweet reminder for each soul on this earth that we must value such little yet precious experiences in our life because it's not the one who has the most is the richest but the one who needs less... Overall a very good message for the reader and it definitely makes us think about life in a very good way... Well done...

Sincerely
Dhiman

Posted 1 Year Ago


MissMisunderstood

1 Year Ago

Thank you so much. That really means a lot to me.
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Gee
Hi, enjoyed the read but think if read aloud and tinkered with it may be a little better. I have cheekily had a little play, tried to even up the meter,to see what it may be.Feel free to ignore me.


Have you ever wished upon a star,
to forget the present and the past,
to leave the world, and all behind,
to find inner peace at last.

Have you ever dreamed darkest dreams,
bleak and lonely through the night,
or of joy, elation, happiness,
bathed in everlasting light.

Posted 1 Year Ago


Gee

1 Year Ago

Hi, the last thing I would expect you to do is change to mine, I would feel exactly as you do. It wa.. read more
MissMisunderstood

1 Year Ago

In that case, thank you. I will definitely remember it in the future.
Gee

1 Year Ago

No problem, good luck
This is so sweet and beautiful. Captures moments of life very well, I definitely have experienced some of those things and was reminded of them by the poem. You're a talented poet and I admire that because personally I can't write poetry very well.

One thing you could think about is punctuation. The poem is in question form, so you could think about whether you want to add any question marks, or whether you'd prefer to have full stops or commas. In my opinion it does need a little more punctuation. (e.g.: after 'shed a tear' I'd put a comma).

- "And the pleasure in seeing it rise" - you've repeated 'pleasure' in the next line.

The very last line was a bit confusing to me, but maybe that's just me. How does laughing make you realize you've uncovered a treasure for the rest of your life? If the last 2 lines are meant to be separate from the laughter part, maybe clarify by removing/changing the 'and' to something else. But possibly I'm just taking it all too literally - I'm not a poetry writer myself :)

Posted 1 Year Ago


MissMisunderstood

1 Year Ago

Thank you for your feedback. I will make sure to proofread the poem again. Also, the last two lines .. read more

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Added on August 30, 2016
Last Updated on May 6, 2017

Author

MissMisunderstood
MissMisunderstood

About
Just a girl who didn't know how to express herself, and found a creative outlet in writing. more..

Writing