The chilly winter

I wrote this poem back in 2011.At that time I was just 9 years old.It was snowing outside and I got the ideas used in the poem by looking my surrounding scenes.

The year has come to an end.
Through out the year our back is bend.
Greetings of new year are being send.
Since it is winter heating systems are lend.

I'very a supplication to God.
May this year bring happiness to us.
It should'nt bring any kind of fear to us.
I hope this winter cold would be less.
What I am thinking, can you guess?
For me winter is a mess.

Author's Note

Please review and comment on this poem.Also rate this.

Reviews

[junXion]

First of all, welcome on writerscafe! It's always nice to see new poets online! Now for some feedback:
Maybe it's a personal thing, but I'm not a fan of the AAAA rhymingstructure. Maybe you could spice things up a little with an other structure? Then using the same word (us) two times with the meaning to rhyme weakens the poem I think. But the overal set-up of the poem and the fact you make story a closed circle is a really good thing! I hope I've been to help for you. Sincerely yours, Jules.

[Najam Us Saher]

A very positive and well wishing poem. I liked it.

[Muneeb khan]

Thanks @Jules for reviewing my writing. I'll try to write better poems as you suggested 'spice things up with the other structure'.