SILENT TREASON

My First Haiku (Read it if you want)

Words unspoken say the most.

            Glass broken hides the ghost.

                        Tides forsaken damage the Coast.

                                  -M.Babu-

Author's Note

Wow writing Haikus is extremely hard! Too short:(

Reviews

[Maureen Mwaniki]

Haikus are haard!kwanza if u take seriously the 5-7-5 syllable rule!this is an interesting read,i wuldnt say 2 short;i havent yet seen a long one!and considering most haikus ths days are just a collection of words and dont realy make sens ths 1 does make sens!unspoken words do say the most somteimes!i like it,keep trying your hand writing haikus!

[Mariel]

Wow, this is really impressive for such a short poem! I love the rhymes, it's amazing. You did a really good job with the words.

[Desert Dreamer]

The forsaken tides, I like that final line. I really like the format used, the words lean to the left. Those rhymes really make this flow, I didn't even notice the rhyming scheme at first. Well done.

[Brook]

Haikus are easy.
But sometimes they don't make sense.
Refrigerator.
-- Who Knows Who Wrote This?

Hahaha, no, you're quite right. It's difficult to write a good haiku and make sure that it makes sense at the same time. However, you seemed to manage it quite alright. Maybe you could make a compilation of Haikus to build it into one big poem? That's what I would end up doing, although I don't really write poetry. Anyways, good job, and nice word choice.

Are you allowed to use commas in Haikus...? Just an afterthought.

[Coyote Poetry]

All three statements are true. Action speak more then words. Take talent to create a poem in 14 words. A excellent poem.
Coyote

[Tate Morgan]

the first haiku i ever liked and the first that made sense and rhymed bravo bravo

[Chelsea]

This is really great! My first attempt at Haiku was way worse, if it makes you feel better!
A nice message given, words unspoken really say the most! It's so true!
Nicely done!

[Alvin L. Kathembe]

I like it...theres a certain mystery, that whole quality of unfinishedness that makes one reread it...well chosen words,and a great haiku all round - a successful experiment!

[Chloe..Across the Unive..]

I agree with you, Haikus are for me difficult.
For your first one I think it is good.
Words unspoken do sometimes say the most..
second line i really like .. forsaken tides do damage.
You wrote this well.

Chloe