Listen up, Damsel

Damn, Damsel, Save yourself!

Listen up there, my dearest damsel in distress,

Stop being so damn dainty and darn defenseless

You'd better think about how to get out of this mess

Or you'll be but a pawn in somebody's game of chess.

You know what, at times you piss me off, princess,

You are not some daffy doll, so doff that daffy dress!
How about you, for once, hike up your silken skirts
And try to avert whatever disaster you yourself can avert?

Best let an armor replace the impractical gown
And start wearing a helmet instead of a crown,
Now gird your loins, get armored and armed

Try to reduce the chances of being harmed.

 

Do not wait around for the protection of a charming prince

Before one comes along, you might already have been minced.

You can't and won't win when you only ever whine and wince

And helpless damsels nobody saved haven't been heard of since.

 

You cannot expect a hero to be there right on cue

When you may be in urgent need of a daring rescue

What will you do when there is no one to save you

When a rescue operation should ever become due?

 

So imagine there won't be a glorious knight

Prepare in time, go and learn how to fight

Because, just in case you won’t be saved,

You're well advised to practice being brave.

Milady, do you really enjoy being stuck in that tower?

But maybe it is time you learn that only cowards cower

And that a crouch is not a courteous composure or posh at all

Especially not performed in the corner of a pompous castle hall.

So do not flinch from fighting and never hide
Learn how to defend what's dear and how to ride

Since, maybe, maiden, you should get yourself a warhorse

To take the reins at last and start directing you life's course.
 

Girl, there are battles to be fought and won

So gear yourself up and put your armor on.

You will need to fight when the knights are gone

And in case some are left, you can still fight along.

 

Don't be dumb and doomed by being but a damned damsel

It's always smarter and safer to know how to save yourself.

Author's Note

Meant metaphorically. Do not take it too seriously, either. Personally, I like dresses. They are, in fact, rather practical in summer. Anyway:
"damsel" = a person waiting for another to fix their problems. Not necessarily female.
Anyways, feel free to comment, criticize, make suggestions... whatever you please.

Reviews

[Shreyas Tripathy]

Very catchy poem !!
I like the roughness and the cynical tone, it kind of helps set up the mood.
No prizes for guessing which was the best part; definitely the 3rd stanza !!
Nice use of "armor" ...
Amazing !
"Don't be dumb and doomed by being but a damned damsel
It's always smarter and safer to know how to save yourself."
SO TRUE ...

[Nath]

Thank you very much for your review!^^
I'm glad you liked it this much!
And agreed: Better safe than sorry, right?

[Nick.B]

Interesting perspective toward the damsels in distress, anyway they all are too sweet for my taste, and brings a not so good example towards kids these days...anyway great poem, I totally agree with you...great job

[Nath]

Thank you!
And you are right, it's very true, all children should learn to stand up for themselves rather than being told to idly sit around waiting for someone to save them.

[Becky]

I agree with Otsana, this is really good. My sentiments exactly. I think dresses are acceptable occasionally, but if something needs doing (or some ogre needs fighting) one shouldn't have to rely on others for assistance. Great piece, I like the rhyming scheme as well.

[Priscilla Sayers]

Amen! Nicely empowering with just the right amount of passion to send the message! Nice!

[Nath]

Thank you, Priscilla!

[Sahar moonlight]

Hi Nath,
This was absolutely awesome...
I find it so interesting and caught my attention in every word.
The idea was kind of new, which make it even more great.
Thanks for sharing such a great work!

Regards,
Natty

[light and ashes]

This has been my frustration with Disney and the way that they have portrayed women more than not. Lilttle girls need to look up to women who are heros not victims. I am glad to see that they are making a few more princesses in a positive light. This is a great poem, and it's message is one hundred percent correct.

[Otsana]

First of all I would like to say I am sorry that I didnt get back to you on this as soon as possible. Secondly, I think you have done a great job with this. I really like the whole idea of it. I feel really annoyed with the damsels in distress because they just reflect badly on women in my opinion and you have really nailed this damsel for it lol. I dont know why you was feeling unsure because it is really good as per usual.

[Nath]

Thanks!
And don't worry, I'm sorry I didn't wait, but I felt I had to get this done while I was in the mood, so, well... Glad you like it! :-)

[Legolas]

Great poem! I loved the metaphor. A couple mistakes:
1. third stanza, some armor instead of an armor
2. Stanza 5 Space between noone so it is no one.
3. Stanza 7 space between My and lady
Great poem!

[Nath]

Thanks!

[Legolas]

Your welcome.