Within My Lustful Gaze

Within My Lustful Gaze

A Poem by Astro
"

Girl watching

"
You are never a moonlit ship
oblivious in your calm passing
my cove of desired intentions
instead, break swiftly to port
dropping anchor
My charming words wade out 
through waves of enticement.
Licentiously compelled you're
caught in a tide beckoned by
Calypso herself
There upon the smooth coast
of my affection you shimmer
naked within my lustful gaze
as we ignite like a Greek-fire
of dancing flesh
The tide of our constant art
crashes and envelops deeper
ript' out, into our sea of love
as Cupid's fiery arrow flames
this carnal pyre 
But as you walk by I wonder,
If, you knew of these things
would you then choose to be
caught within my lustful gaze
or stay oblivious?

© 2013 Astro


Author's Note

Astro
Forgive me for attempting to use the fine form of poetry that is well perfected by the wonderful Girl Friday(Sarah. W). It just seemed to fit.

My Review

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Reviews

i know this ones from a while back, but i just realized i'd never gotten to this RR! i'm glad i came by to give it a read. love the form and the way you worked with it. i often wonder how i would be taken in by an outside observer, how a writer would describe me. i highly doubt it would be half as beautiful as this! i love this observation writing style with that touch of insight in the last stanza. also loved these lines:
"you're
caught in a tide beckoned by
Calypso herself"
i enjoyed the mythology in there. well done!

Posted 10 Years Ago


Astro

10 Years Ago

Well better late than never. Thanks Dana glad you enjoyed it.
you did this form very well...i love the transitions in this poem,...the luring, although not so much needed...she is more than willing...

they make a nice calypso together...but then it turns to something else...and maybe for her just feels like it was sex for him..just physical..she may have regrets or she may have just wanted the same as he.

nicely done, Astro.

Posted 10 Years Ago


Astro

10 Years Ago

Thanks Jacob, I'm glad this one impressed you so, thank you very much.
Another beautiful one Astro. People are beautiful, especially when they are in their natural form, unhindered, not acting, just being themselves. I love the descriptions you being to this piece. If you made a woman feel half as beautiful as the words on this page I'm sure any woman would be glad to be caught in your gaze. And the form is perfect. It really adds to what your saying.

Posted 10 Years Ago


Astro

10 Years Ago

Well all women should feel beatiful, because they are. The most beatiful gift in the world. Thank .. read more
Gosh! Amazing loved it Astro, unique and really different topic and i really loved it :)
thanks for the invite :)
- Singh :)

Posted 10 Years Ago


Astro

10 Years Ago

Thank you for a really wonderful review Singh.
To see these poetic lustful words behind the gazing eyes just might make one of those girls turn and smile, Astro. I am a huge fan of Sarah's work. She blows me away so often. I could definately see her touch here. Nicely done, man! Angi~

Posted 10 Years Ago


Astro

10 Years Ago

Thanks Angi, for the compliment and the vote of confidence! :D
Very well done my friend. You have captured desire and dreams in a nice form. Standing back, just another face in the crowd, but the focus is what makes you stand apart. Very cool.

Posted 10 Years Ago


Astro

10 Years Ago

Thanks Jack, most definitely an exercise in perspectives. One understood all too well by the single.. read more
Very exquisite but now you have me thinking that Friday is naked....lustful gaze, can it ever be oblivious? You do have an enchanting way with words my friend! I didn't read Sarah in this until I read your author's note, you made it your own, quite lovely.

Posted 10 Years Ago


Astro

10 Years Ago

Hahhah, nice to hear from you Frieda. Well in my lustful gaze all you women are 'naked' as Emily pu.. read more
Superb imagery my friend. The format worked very well which helped the flow of this one.

My charming words wade out
through waves of enticement.

Loved these two lines. Beautiful imagery and smooth tone.

We are all here to learn from one another. I am humbled to see such gratitude on WC that allows us to experiment with one anothers ideas. As Sarah has put it, throw a curve ball. Well done.

Posted 10 Years Ago


Astro

10 Years Ago

Thanks very much for the awesome review Troy, it has become a beautifully attractive tribute so far.
the words are lovely, and it is a good question you pose at the end

would we choose to be caught or wish for a cloak of invisibility? i've felt both in my days

Posted 10 Years Ago


Astro

10 Years Ago

Indeed, the question was poignant to the heart of the poem and I truly understand your having felt b.. read more
Hi Astro,

Firstly, I am sorry it has been a while since I reviewed you. As you know I closed my account and before that I had a hectic schedule.

Secondly, I adored this write, I thought this look quite similar to another poet that I have read and then I saw your 'Authors Note' and saw it was about Sarah, the amazing poetess. (:

"There upon the smooth coast

of my affection you shimmer

naked within my lustful gaze

as we ignite like a Greek-fire

of dancing flesh"

This is my favourite stanza of yours, I think it was really well written, with some really vivid imagery, too. And the wording of the write all in is amazing! (:

~ Noodle.

Posted 10 Years Ago


Astro

10 Years Ago

Thanks a lot Noodle, it has been a while but welcome back just the same. I'm glad you appreciated t.. read more

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601 Views
13 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 2 Libraries
Added on July 26, 2013
Last Updated on July 26, 2013
Tags: Lust, desire, love, sex, mythology, poetry

Author

Astro
Astro

Vancouver Island, BC, Canada



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