January Fires

This is about January! Cold, cold January and her desire for fire, and the warmth that left frozen.

 

In a place

That once brought her comfort

On the coldest night of the year,

She assembles herself - knees to her chest

And waits

For the very touch that warmed her

And gave her life

Has left her frozen.

Lifeless in front of a crackling fire.

Wood snaps,

Smoke rises,

Breaking her gaze as tears fold

In the creases of her eyes.

They do not fall.

She fears the end

As much as she fears her broken - breathing,

And that is the only thing

 

That keeps

 

Her heart

 

Beating.

Author's Note

Written, January 2009.

Reviews

[Pax Analog]

A chillingly effective image of inner emotional stasis meeting raw survival instinct.

This time of the year and the Capricorn zodiac cycle it coincides with is always about a slow unthawing after the passing of pre-Christmas cheer, Sagittarian humor to Capricornian sobriety.

Fearing one's own cessation of breath as much as the next inhalation is a harrowing condition, captured with painstaking and unflinching attention by your poetic lines.

Strong, honest, brave poem.

[Anastasia Starlena]

What a beautifully written sad piece so full of heart imagery. I like this piece pulls at the emotions a bit.

[Deborah Leah Krempa]

A very well written poem. Thank you for sharing. Debileah

[J. Alexis Balaguer]

Nixie,
What you've written here is a powerful moment of realization and melancholy.
Always have enjoyed your poetry.

Take care.
Punishment

[JohnL]

So this cold is of the heart - not of the ambient temperature; the place that once warmed her is not the grate in front of her - her 'January-cold' place is the heart of another. Her twigs crackle and her wood burns but there is no warmth. What there is is fear - of death? Of no longer breathing? Of the unknown? Ah but fear is the great producer of determination, of will, of power over circumstance. Soon, the crackling, smoking wood will be blazing up the chimney, some warmth will begin to creep back and the world will seem a gradually better place.
smoothly and carefully expressed. An object lesson in metaphor, a recipe for survival.
John

[Wolffe]

Hey there. Stopped by and caught this. Lovely description. The power is found through the word play and creative structure that enhances the focus of the piece. This kept me riveted to the end and I found no errors.

[EmpressPoetess]

very emotionally written. one can read alot in these words. Great writing

[Gary H]

I think this shows a lot of potential in your writing. I recently learnt that modern style poetry should not have capital letters at the beginning of each line unless this is for the start of a new line. The effect being that the whole sentence is worked through or made more static depending on how long the sentence is. Now all this works if you read the poem to yourself out loud - the bathroom is the best place.

Check out Carol Ann Duffy to see what I mean - http://www.contemporarywriters.com/authors/?p=auth104
or listen to Simon Armitage - http://www.poetryarchive.org/poetryarchive/singlePoet.do?poetId=87

Hope this is useful.

[Honeypot]

This one is terribly sad. You want to put your arm around her and tell her everything is going to be ok. You do a wonderful job of expressing emotion and it brings the whole poem to life. You can actually see her sitting there sorrowful and forlorn.

I've missed your poetry. This one was really very good.

[Shadow Writer]

A wonderful use of emotions in this piece. The imagery was well placed. Enjoyed the write. Phantom.....