I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

A Poem by October

 

I have dreams like rain falling across the cracks in my brain,
Haunting me, making me scream, there’s not much I can say
My words get lost in echoes, in distance, in muffled whispears they say my name, I’m not sane
If only I could find you today.
 
Everything here is a prision, with bars and guards that turn everything to dust,
And I want to tell you, but the words won’t come, my mouth is a desert, dry and broken
Days pass like wind chimes, dried blood on my sleeve, nothing but dead lust
In the air, smells of disapointment, I want to save them all, but I’m broken
 
Someone wiser could save you, take you by the hand, never look back
But I’m a liar, a cheater, I betray and in my hands, things destroy themselves
I’m writing this to tell you I’m sorry, to tell you I’d take it all back
I’d take every word, rip them down like wallpaper, turn over the tables, tear down the shelves.
 
In some ways we are the fiction, In some time, none of this will exist.
It is a carcus on a highway, Something I won’t miss.

© 2008 October


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This poem I have to say was well written. We are all broken in this wrold that has so many horrible things in it. We look for someone to help us make this world a better place for all people to live. Sometimes we help others times we fail that is how life is. We say we are sorry to make the person that we are trying to help feel better. But the truth is it really did not change anything. If people would work together this world would be a better place for everyone. Thank for this wonderful poem. Keep up the good work I will be waiting for more.

Humbly,
Jwana Creer Yeshua

Posted 15 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

I Love the other reviews. Emotional disturbance is a reality. Reality is what we see and experience everyday. The key here is what do we really see that is the same as the next person? Nothing. I do however think that you show remarkable talent in expressing your emotional state. Sorrow and pain can only be experienced in the heart. You put it on paper for me to read and share..Thank You..

Posted 14 Years Ago


"I'd take every word, rip them down like wallpaper," - good, succinct image
"with bars and guards that turn everything to dust" - I like the internal rhyme of bars and guards here

"It is a carcus on a highway" [carcass] - I like the metaphor, and also the deadpan delivery; the deliverance of the whole piece is admirably strong.

Lots of interesting thoughts and imagery throughout. At first glance I thought it was a bit a-typical angsty...but it's not. It has all your originality. Great write.

p.s.
"in muffled whispears they say my name" [typo: whispers]

Posted 14 Years Ago


This is a deep and true statement. Great job.

Posted 15 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

This poem I have to say was well written. We are all broken in this wrold that has so many horrible things in it. We look for someone to help us make this world a better place for all people to live. Sometimes we help others times we fail that is how life is. We say we are sorry to make the person that we are trying to help feel better. But the truth is it really did not change anything. If people would work together this world would be a better place for everyone. Thank for this wonderful poem. Keep up the good work I will be waiting for more.

Humbly,
Jwana Creer Yeshua

Posted 15 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.


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Added on November 30, 2008

Author

October
October

Decatur, AL



About
Quiet. Disturbed. Insane. more..

Writing
You woke up. You woke up.

A Poem by October