A Story by Sara Muschweck

I have made so many mistakes over the years that my life seems always to be in shambles.  Since nineteen I was a single mother, having one child after another with the wrong men.  Always looking for the knight in shining armor that I had read about as a little girl.  Never once stopping to think that it was wrong to start those relationships from the start, always jumping in over my head and handing over my heart as well as my life.  Walking away broken and carrying another child. 

After my third child I made the steps to no longer be able to conceive, feeling that the next man in my life will love me and my children as we are.  Then I focused on my babies.  I worked hard, took care of them most of the time without the benefit of child support, and we grew together.  I did meet a wonderful man and marry, yet once again my past crossed my future and I chose the road to ruin. 

Leaving my husband for a ghost from my past was the hardest and cruelest thing I have ever done.  I live with the guilt every day that I walked away from my life on the chance that my past was where I needed to be.  Now I sit once again shattered and surrounded with reminders that I should have let my past die in my heart and not carry it with me. 

I will stand again, this time I will stand alone, the children are almost grown, and soon one by one they will be leaving to find their own lives.  My past has moved on to greener pastures, my lovely ex-husband is now a part of my past, and I see a future of being alone.  So I will surround myself in my cocoon of numbness and carry on. 

© 2009 Sara Muschweck

Author's Note

Sara Muschweck
just venting

My Review

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I scanned some of your other stories and consistently saw nothing but highly-skilled, polished writing. There is no difference here, as expected. On this subject, I think most of make mistakes when we're young, (I sure did) but what matters is if we learn from those mistakes and make appropriate changes. None of us are born with wisdom, and finding it is often costly.

Posted 8 Years Ago

wow, this is very powerful and heartbreaking, and speaks the absolute of
the heart, as far as story writing ability, I give it an A. the reader can see
so many aspects through your words, such as life, love and happiness and
a sense of rebuilding. you've done an exceptional job. keep it up.

Posted 8 Years Ago

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2 Reviews
Added on September 28, 2009


Sara Muschweck
Sara Muschweck

Along the river, OH

What should I tell you about me? My kids are my whole world and I try to give them the best in me that I have. I want them to grow up being proud of me for the mother I have been. I love to read t.. more..