Inexistent

Just my feelings jumping all over the paper.

The time came when forbidden was it to speak of yesterday. Hours whispering about why we started.

The finish of infinity came with tossing at night.

Never forgot captivating moments they muttered all dreams were made of.

Quit remembering when he became your god.

When your life was then frozen.

Falling off ledges lasting forever.

Insane, maybe just tired.

Awake laying open.

Blue veins throwing shadows, fighting gainst the sky, opening weapons.

The life threatened by hopelessly confused words.

Cause he left.

He's gone.

Not even attached strings.

I'd have tied them round my fingers.

Some piece left to savour in a world so black, so blue.

Sober is a word I'd love not to use.

Drown every smile I miss, every laugh inside a bottle of deathly bubbles.

Til it spills out my eyes swallowing the land I'll never trace.

I'll hide.

I'll sleep.

For eternity or maybe just for a memory.

The stabbing feels good when cutting the chords is gone.

Afraid more of my words not working.

Broken as today.

Lost with another philisophical word.

Tossing and turning like a weaving distress.

The calls are faulted. My heart paces into the background.

Proven to undeserving smirks.

Trialed inside, broken out.

Like a shell but a cage.

My gluttonous discussions as strong as black tears.

Running down the sink.

Feathers tear at my insides.

The silence twitching at my eyes.

The night won't come and the day won't start.

Alone.

The one word echoing year after year.

You've gone.

My soft little fingers tap.

Like my broken soul.

Letters join, combine, swirl.

Into an exhaustive thought pattern.

Only I can't get the music to scream loud enough.

And the sound won't fill me.

Not anymore.

The days can't stick and the glue already dried

Clumping around my feet.

My innocence forgotten.

My inexistent wisdom faded.

The sand already tried warming ice.

My chest falters.

The treble fell from my page.

The inked notes wrinkle.

Blurry.

My passion won't float.

Repeat, replay, restore.

I'll wake again.

Then relive it all over.

The same day, the same age.

The same headache.

Pounding down and into filling empty fingertips.

I'm happy.

Not satisfied.

Flying and soaring ended with new bridges.

Forgotten by explosions.

It was gone.

The year, the days, my time.

So short, so slipping.

I thought it'd happen forever.

Maybe past isn't tomorrow.

Maybe tomorrow won't be the same as last week.

But my heart won't change.

Won't form.

Won't mold.

Shivering.

Cold.

Tired.

Moved on but forgot my veins.

The rain is falling.

This time from the stars.

Trees grown around my overrated humanity.

My smile was fake.

The sound still isn't loud enough!

My tires won't burn quick enough.

Then the door closes.

Right as I crash into it.

Words like rock fumble and close.

Decrepid and ugly.

Gray as love.

Ceilings fall sideways.

Doors open wide to closing walls.

Velvet beads sound angrily the triumph of demons.

My demons.

Made to last.

Hooked like broken glass around my neck.

I'm done peering.

I'm done walking.

I'm leaving you, I'm leaving them.

I'm leaving the past behind.

And never am I looking back.

My name isn't yours any longer, because I'm long gone.

Reviews

[kingblaq]

Wow...That was intense..WRITE ON!

[Craig Froman]

It is so profoundly moving when you let your feelings jump all over the page... A personal sounding music flows here, speaking of a shared life, now moving you on from a place that was once defined as love... pain and sorrow mingled, and a name forever altered.

[Angelic Surrender]

Powerful. Nice work :)

[Diwakar - "The Warrior ..]

deep and intense emotion...............love it :-)

[....]

such a deep write full of sadness and pain.
Well written and expressed.

[Lawrence Parlier]

"Only I can't get the music to scream loud enough" !!! Brilliant! This is a truly a great poem.

[Literary Artist Dream]

A strikingly emotive write, very good work.

[Daniela May]

Wow it's amazing x I could really feel the passion and pain and I was glued to Ut which is exactly what you want from a reader! It hooked me and made me feel what you feel which connected me to the poem, you are a very talented writer :)

[Reaper]

Very deep. Knowing you puts a lot of insight in my mind of you. I love the poem, i know its very painful but its extremely well written. great job wifey

[joshua deathdealer]

Wow a lot of pain and reflection here. I enjoyed this very much.