ChinesePorcelainSlut & TheHermaphroditeGod

SchizophrenicSex ;]]

When my ebony lips of Saturn took you in…

I choked on ivory-white fluids.

 

Light trembled through the cracks of your eyelids as I strolled through the lines of your hair, brushing back with my hand the sequential lips fluttering beyond orgasmic wings of pretty butterflies, hissing steam-powered kisses through your steel walls downstairs.

Lovely echoes of the heart brainwashed us with steel wool, reverberating the lost remnants of ghost particles chambered in bereft psychos as they wail loudly in their cold, empty padded cells.

Our legs entwined in serpentine embrace with voices in my head manifesting their words in porcelain hands to pinch your rosy cheeks; their adoration of you adorned with crystalized footsteps floating above sea-leveled landscapes of abstracted luminescence.

Plausibility drips like acid in Dreamscapes, though with all its credibility left untethered behind atrocious sheep-cattle muttering heathen-lies I can still find you dancing in the relocated whims of our beloved cancerous Master.

Dead tongues twist and tie corroded, rustic metals of the Mind, and like blunt razor blades etched with rune-like glyphs bestowing untold magick your body scraps and grinds in dull cuts into my aching and wanting skin.

Author's Note

Its...its just weird-- I'm just effing weird O.o

I know, I know...this is definitely NOT sexy. Will no doubt go over this some time in the near future ^.^;

I dunno...I guess I thought it'd be cool to try and be different when it comes to writing erotica, but all I've managed to write is some weird abstract piece of crap alluding to sex.
Meh, just pretend that this is how a schizo/retard percieves sex ;P

EDIT: I would like to thank my buddy SelkieTales for pointing out the old woman thing as a turn off, so I quickly changed that and hope what I've revised sounds much better ^-^ thankies again, luv!

Reviews

[That_Girl]

It's definitely different than any erotica I have ever read before... but, I truly enjoyed it. While no, I wouldn't classify it as a 'heart pumping, sexy piece', it is still quite passionate. I really liked this, will have to read more of your poems. :)

[Pete]

title intrigued me so i had to read. this almost sounds like someone more into s&m. your wording and imagery is definitely different and not soon forgotten. you have a cool way of knitting unexpected words together. glad i read ... :)

[Richard]

it's not weird it's very imagined and realized I enjoyed it :)

[Ed Fagan]

It holds a twisted abstract flow intertwined with deep erotic imagery. normal sucks be thankful you're not. (as I am sure are) I enjoyed this.

[Rob Santana]

damn it's like you got a bucket of words and threw them on the screen and said "here read this s**t" Freaken awesome. You have a way with words that just possess me. Light trembled threw the cracks of your eyelids, that's bad a*s right there. I should tattoo that line on my chest!!! That's some crazy s@#* right there!!! Really looken forward to reading more of your work.

[Kaylor Mason]

I think it's more thought provoking than erotic, but it definitely opens up new avenues of imagery for the mind. And no, I don't think you're weird in the least--nor a retard. I think you're cool

[DiMar4u]

wow, wicked piece....thanks for sharing-

[Ian H Morrison]

hey dont diss this i really liked it it is well written and very erotic

[lee von cleef]

I was just taking a shower in the down spout, why did you have to pour rocks on me? I got a picture of two robots wrecking each others future.... lots of pictures I ve got to hide under.....

[L0v3craft]

lmfao sorry mate xD

[Amduscia]

Addictive!! Very Captivating!!

[Alessander]

I actually think this style suites you best. I don't know if you wrote this on acid, alcohol. or just plain horny juice, but whatever the method, it works.

[L0v3craft]

thanks, hun ^-^

oh and pfffft! only 'normal' people take acid or drink alcohol to get to my 'level', lol. i honestly wrote this out of strange whimsy with the nagging thought: "gee, i wonder what people will think if i start using surreal, abstract phrases/whateva in erotic writing?" XD

needless to say, it takes someone as effed up as me on epic proportion to crap something like this, lmao

but again, thanks for the review ;P