Found it in Silence

Tried so hard to read his mind

Through it all

I was scared

I was blind

But

I found it in silence

I finally see

There's no turning back

I know what's good for me

Hidden away and buried deep in my drawer, I found them.

His mail art and old letters to me.

Most girls would've burned them long ago...but I held them and I looked at them,

I decided to keep them.

I felt no pain.

Not a twinge of sorrow as his whimsical and twisted creatures gazed back at me.

In my closet,

It was coated in dust

My old Killarney sign.

I placed it back up on my window ledge.

Instead of anger, I felt pride.

I owe it to that small Irish town.

Killarney helped me blossom.

And soon in my hands was a letter I wrote.

Dated back in 2015.

At just 22 years old I wrote of him to Albie.

And my 25 year old's heart skipped a beat.

I re read it, eying a certain sentence.  

I knew.

I knew back then.

I knew before I met him.

I knew I was dealing with a toxic person, but refused to believe it.

But this proved to me;

Always trust your gut.

A l w a y s.

Oh Kathryn. I thought: 

You beautiful and wild girl!

My how far you've come.

In my bedroom.

On the floor.

I found it in silence:

Happiness.

Tranquility.

Freedom.

Acceptance of the past.

I finally see.

Author's Note

Reviews

[Anjali]

I love all your stories as it connects all the dots you were wished to express. Every time I read your stories I could see before myself a beautiful girl- a strong woman who has come a long way along her journey. Wishing you good luck for an amazing journey ahead. God Bless you dear :)
Hugs
Anjali

[golden]

Isn't it amazing all the things we find in silence.

[heavenscentgirl1]

Oh Kathryn, this is a brillient piece.

I love the way you've presented a whole story in three succinctly separate pieces tied together through your thought process and actions ... and the song/video was the perfect selection.

My friend, you have painted a very clear vision through your word selections ~ which made me feel as if I was right there sitting on the bedroom floor with you. (I must confess, I have a letter dated December 22, 1961 that I take out and read from time to time too).

Kathryn, I pray that you are doing well and will continue allowing the past to stay there ~ in the past! Its OK to keep the memories, for they are part of your Life story ~ just don't dwell on them and live in the past ... move on and "be happy". ((((Hugs))))

Please take care and enjoy your weekend young lady! 😜

Blessings, 🙏
~ hsg

[Black Rose]

Woah! It's like you have touched my soul through this piece. I mean I can totally relate(not like I have experienced it but yeah the essence of hurt, regret,longing we all crave for ) and the way you expressed mind blowing.