Sway

shall we dance

Dance with me
please
hold me close
sway with me
bone to bone
arms around
waist
arms around
neck
sway

Let the music take us
to another
realm
just you
me
swaying

Not too close
when we are alone
then
we will fall into
each others skin

For now
just need you
holding me
dance me
and sway
with me

Stay

Author's Note

restoration .. my mind is numb so no poems or stories come .. they are sleeping

Reviews

[Blackbirdsong]

I can almost hear and feel the rhythm of the music in this one. I really love the inner thoughts of the speaker. The flirty way she's like come here, but not too close. Later. That's the way to control a man. Besides they love it when we take command like that. lol

Good read. :)

[Stacey]

Ahh I like the words close and bone being near each other. I also like how then it alone on the line in the third stanza. It was a great way to separate the setting.

[Greg the Bard]

The movement is well done and I like the style. It is one that I like to use as well. I feel that this is more prose than pome. I would like to have added a three dimintional force to sway like color. I know from reading a lot of you work that you often was color as an exciter and it would really go well here. However it is a well done view of sway and stay. I loved the read.

[Blackbirdsong]

Well I'm glad you restored this one because it's really good...I love the feeling of the swaying and dancing here...it reaches beyond the dance floor into the what this relationship...we all dance through life in one way or another and this plays with that idea quite well :)

[Kelley Pascoe]

Kind of reminds me of that song........" Music playing, bodies swaying..... Hows it go ???? Its stuck in my head now. Slow dancing , swaying to the music.... No one else but you and ...... Hows it go????
See what you have done to me Chloe!!!! (smile) This was a cool poem and I have always liked your stuff.
Thanks for sharing.
Kelley

[A.r. Bazian]

i like!
its nice!
but its a bit beyond the one you love/like. right?

[Ashes of Apathy]

Miss Chloe,
The simplicity of the this piece is its strength. Often I catch myself becoming rigorous with impatience, weighed down trying to find those perfect, elegant, fitting words when they are more often than not they lye right in front of me for the taking. I am just too consumed with myself to realize that less is so often, much more. This piece illlusrates the simplicty of expressing a valid, candid point through only a select few words. What is present is how carefully you chose which words you would use to create a a vision: dancing- not to close, but just close enough to feel safe and secure. It gives the mental picture of the two of you swaying to the music, head resting his (or her) chest. At peace if only for a moment.
-jr

[Staci Brown]

This poem is bugging me out cuz it reminds me of a song from the 70's and I can't remember the name!! lol I know it's a song by Steve Miller Band though... Might be their song Swingtown... :)

[Staci Brown]

we will fall into
each others skin

These are my favorite lines in this poem... nice image :)

Sweet poem hon.

Faerie Blessings!

[Me]

Simplistic yet elegant. Hidden inside of such an innocent, simple grouping of words you've managed to capture the intricacies of some extremely complex emotions. Beautiful.

[{Angel Redd}[Formerly A..]

Gorgeous. romantic and sensual, without being over the top.