Only Sleeping

Only Sleeping

A Story by Patz Leviste
"

My first short story

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It was started last 2015. A boy met a random girl and never thought of anything about it. They started as friends and go out and be beside each other for the longest time. He never imagines that that feeling he started to grow will lead him to a sorrowful and hurtful moment of his life.

 

He loved her more than anyone else. He trusted her more than he trusts himself. He supported her the way he knows. He even pushed her to follow her dreams. Though he knows it’s hard to be apart from each other, he still let her go to another country, so she could fulfill her dreams. He never thought that this will be the start of his dreadful life.

 

For the past 2 years being in a relationship, they had some fights and arguments that almost leads them to breakup. But this time, it was because of another person.

 

While they’re hundreds of thousands of miles away from each other, the girl started to see someone. Knowing this incident made the boy feel like he’s useless. Almost ended his life. He wanted to hate her and curse her for what she did, but the by loved her so much that he couldn’t do it.

 

The boy wanted to save their relationship even this will make him so stupid. He’s ready to forget what the girl did just to save their relationship. But she refused and wanted to find herself. This event of his life shuttered and he lose direction.

 

Now, the boy don’t even know what to do. Thinking positively is no use now. He’s so depressed and broken to think right. His heart keeps on pumping abnormally. Especially when some thought comes to mind that she is happy, smiling, doing things she wants to do, going out and seeing others and that he is not even part of it anymore.

 

The boy trying to be happy for himself. Trying to go out, get wasted, but it doesn’t help and do any good. Tried to think to see another woman, but he is so deeply and imprisoned by the love he have for the girl. No one and nothing will make him feel better. Unless…..

 

He goes to sleep. Only sleeping helps him forget. Only sleeping makes him feel nothing happened. Only sleeping.

 

He wished that this was all just a bad dream. He wished that when he woke up, everything will be alright. 

© 2017 Patz Leviste


Author's Note

Patz Leviste
This is my first time writing, please let me know if there's something i need to work about so i could make it better. Thank you.

My Review

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Featured Review

As written it seems like an angst fest. Have you tried writing this in the third person. Third might give you, the writer, a little distance to draw breath, and give the reader more of a story and less of a confession.
As it stands this reader's full sympathy is not with the narrator, but with the wayward girl. Both are enjoying just deserts.

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Patz Leviste

6 Years Ago

Thank you for your review. I appreciate it so much since is my first. I will try to rewrite this in .. read more
Delmar Cooper

6 Years Ago

Rewriting in another form has always been a good exercise for me, and it might be fun for you too.
Patz Leviste

6 Years Ago

Yeah. Thank you for you advise. When i read it again, it seems like it was written by someone new. :.. read more


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Reviews

As written it seems like an angst fest. Have you tried writing this in the third person. Third might give you, the writer, a little distance to draw breath, and give the reader more of a story and less of a confession.
As it stands this reader's full sympathy is not with the narrator, but with the wayward girl. Both are enjoying just deserts.

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Patz Leviste

6 Years Ago

Thank you for your review. I appreciate it so much since is my first. I will try to rewrite this in .. read more
Delmar Cooper

6 Years Ago

Rewriting in another form has always been a good exercise for me, and it might be fun for you too.
Patz Leviste

6 Years Ago

Yeah. Thank you for you advise. When i read it again, it seems like it was written by someone new. :.. read more

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82 Views
2 Reviews
Added on December 28, 2017
Last Updated on December 29, 2017

Author

Patz Leviste
Patz Leviste

Laguna, Region 4-A, Philippines



About
I am a newbie trying to explore and do new things i've never done before. A lost soul trying to share experiences i had in my life. more..

Writing