Hymn of the Forgotten

This one has been giving me troubles for the last couple of days.

We are the shades of a past forgotten,

Living with blades upon our necks,

Under the dominance of ethereal magic,

Drawn into schemes with knives in backs.

We are the whispers in the silent darkness,

Fighting for a way to raise our voice,

Suppressing the captivity of our minds,

Hoping for a glimpse of awaited rejoice.

We are the winds from a better world,

Trying to envelop others in gust,

Fully aware that refusing to unite,

Will only move nothing but dust.

We are the dreams of a future so bright,

Since living in reality can be so cruel,

Still we hold the world in our hands,

Because the world is rightfully ours to rule.

Reviews

[The White Wolf]

Holy bejesus, Tom, you wrote the perfect hymn for a revolution!!! This has some real strength behind it. I see a movement against those that oppress either with words or actions, for those who fight for the right to be themselves, not copies of everyone else. That's what I got from it, what you intended meaning was is your own, but I really enjoyed. Thankee.

[Lonely Islander]

Oh wow! It feels good to read honest poems, poems that talk about reality and not just cheesy made up stuff. It takes a lot of talent to write something like this. You are a talented one !:-):-):-D.

[Tomislav Petricevic]

Thanks! :D

[Brianna(:]

I love this(: You did a GREAT job(: I'm becoming a fan of your writing :)

[Yeser Berro]

Magnificent!!
I can relate. I liked the pattern. Good Job!

[Tai]

Amazing poem indeed. 'We," changes in the perspective in every person, it may be an entirely different meaning compared between you and I. The first stanza was powerful and you managed to just barely keep the strength until the ending. Well done!

[....]

This is amazing, I really enjoyed this

[Morrigan Nicole]

Different, but in a good way, we is obviously the dead. Or just those who are paid no attention. Just as Paige said. Well done. Lovely job.

[M1@]

this is an amazing poem great job tom! "we" is a mystery and what you see it as depends on the person. this is very "magical" and descreptive to me. i love it

[Brittany]

The forgotten people of this world (not necessarily dead), but the title helped. :) You may have wrestled with this for a few days, but I think you nailed it. This was well written and powerful. Great word choice and imagery.

[Lunny]

I like it, it is good