Chapter 4 - Am I Invisible?

The fourth of 8 past blog posts.

I'm beginning to think so. Seriously.

A lot of people want to be invisible in society and just be ignored, but I can say that I want to be the opposite. I want to make a difference, but not in the typical and exhausted leader of a charity way or humanitarian, etc. I want to stand out, but not by dressing differently than everyone else or something along those lines. I want to be known as an intelligent person, to be recognized for my insight, and to be credited with statements that no one else thinks of. But lately, I'm just feeling invisible, and that's completely contrary to what I want.

This whole little reflection is partly due to the fact that my first semester of my sophomore year of high school just ended, and I really started thinking, what am I doing with my life. Sure, that question seems simple enough: going to high school, doing homework, and playing hockey. But where is that going to lead me? I started to look at the big picture, even beyond college; I don't want to be "famous" the way that most people seek it, through singing/acting/dancing/entertainment. I want my legacy to be something about my intelligence, and I don't know if that's the image I'm creating about myself, publicly speaking. I'm trying to figure out how other people view me and what they probably think about me, and as sad as it is, I actually do care what people think of me. I wish I didn't, but I just can't not care.. anyway, I feel like I'm not living what I want to be, almost like being fake or living a lie. I want to be smart and not be ashamed of it, how nice would that be? I just don't want to be invisible.

I don't want my life to be forgettable.

I don't want to die without making an impact.

 

Leave a legacy. Don't be invisible.

 

Listen to: Thunder - Boys Like Girls

Author's Note

Thank you for reading.

Reviews

[Elwina]

I've been reading your first posts and it really sends me back to my 16ish years.
I just want to tell you that with time, growing up, it gets easier. It takes courage not to give up, and sometimes alot of faith, but it does.
You seem like a very special person to me.