something

i just need to write

its interesting, loving your best friend

in other peoples perspective it seems easy

that everything will fall into place someday

a part of me wishes for that

that we will live the so called "fairy tale" everybody believes we will 

a different part of me hides behind the fact that it isn't realistic 

it isn't realistic that at my age i've found the love of my life

the one person who will understand me and love me when no one else will 

i hope that you will be that person eventually

i can't imagine you not being in my life

talking to you everyday

telling you things i can't tell anyone else

listening to you talk about what you care about

hearing you talk about your dreams and what you want for your future

but this is where i become a bad person

your dream, is to go to a place i can't go 

your future, is to become an actor or comedian 

as much as i want your dreams and wishes to come true

i hope you don't go 

don't be mad at me for hoping this and i'm not blaming you for what i say next 

after everything you've said you've made me fall in love with what our future could be

writers studio apartment, you teaching me to mow the lawn at our first house, seeing what our child would look like

it all seems so close

but if you go, we aren't going to have any of that 

i wish that we would, but honey it just doesn't make sense 

to quote the love song, i can't help falling in love with you 

i've fallen so hard 

when every once and a while i think about this, it makes me cry

it makes me cry because i know i'm being selfish and thats why i've never had this conversation with you

i've told you about how i hope that our futures include each other and you've agreed with me

we've built up the fairy tale and all i want to do is live it with you 

i just want to know, how do you expect this all to go

i don't expect some elaborate romantic proposition, I just want an answer

how do you see me entering your future? 

i want to know how that would change once you know how i feel 

i remember one time in one of the first few months we were dating

we were sitting on the swing in your backyard looking up at the stars

talking about how we both sleep in weird ways all spread out 

then you told me to wish on a star 

i'm not going to reveal what i wished, but it had to do with our future and how i wanted you there

i want you there more than anything i can think of 

i want to do so many things with you 

i want to experience things with you 

z, i want to live our fairy tale and prove to ourselves that we can be each others future 

Reviews

[Erika Maass]

I really like the honesty in this poem so many people pick people up and put them down... to fall so in love so young is hard.... it comes with many challenges and other people usually poo par this kind of love that's it's puppy love etc.... this love is real you made it real .... I don't t know if this is autobiographical but ... my fairytale came true! have been with my husband since 16 still going strong and have 3 kids so I can really relate to my younger self in this poem!

[heather]

This is autobiographical and coincidentally I am sixteen right now. That gives me a lot more hope that my fairytale could still come true, thank you so much!

[barleygirl]

I really love the honesty & authenticity of this message. Very very seldom does a writer write about "love" (& millions of poets do) . . . yet your message is so true-to-life, not filled with boring clichés about everything being grand & awesome or romantic & sweet or even s****y & abusive. No, instead, you are dealing with something very basic to the core of life & how relationships go awry . . . different expectations. This is the hardest aspect of being "in love" . . . wanting a future with this person, but deep down, not really wanting a future that looks like what the other person wants. People get too wrapped up in the trappings of life, instead of just loving a person no matter what. Your message is such a refreshing, delightful confession of mismatched expectations, & I love that nobody is blaming anybody else, but you're just laying it out there with all the inherent flaws. Also, the amount of details really makes this message sing with recognition for most people.

[heather]

Thank you for seeing my "true-to-life" message because it is definitely 100% authentic to what I am going through right now. It didn't need to be filled with the clichés about romantic, sweet and s****y stuff in our relationship because I agree all of that is boring (sometimes). I needed to write how I felt about being so deeply in love at such a young age and how I don't know where we will end up. I'm glad that you found my message refreshing, thank you!