Farewell

The poet bids adieu to her loved ones as she is about to take her life... Read on to find out why...

Perhaps this was meant to be,

an unending love story.

I am where I used to be

in the same spot, cold and lonely.

Why? oh why?

have the fates dealt me the hand of cruelty.

Why? oh why?

do I sing lugubriously? 

As my life now comes to an end, 

I take a breath to slowly mend.

Mend my dying soul, 

for the time has come.

The time for me to feel everlasting love,

Farewell my loved ones 

or so I say

See you on heavenly judgement day.

Author's Note

Review/criticism welcomed

Reviews

[Warrior]

Very awesome read. I like how your writing flows together, to make me visualize everything that's going on. Many stories on here do that, and that's why most of the stories I read on here are good because you all are very talented and gifted, I visualized everything as I was reading it. Great writing. On to another topic. I have a website where I post my short stories, and blogs on. I also have ads on the website. I was wondering if you can go to my website, and click on any ad. you don't have to buy anything, I promise you won't get any viruses, all it is is google adsense on my website, and the more clicks on the ads, the more it helps grow my website. My website is bwlawson.com I appreciate it, that you would be taking part in helping my craft, business, product, and brand grow. Thank you!

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Beautifully crafted piece of lost love.
Love is a powerful thing. It can become the very reason to live and die as well, for that matter.
Very well written. Liked the picture, it compliments the words.

[Ria Carol]

Thank you for your review

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

You are welcome.

[Shabeeh Haider]

Love stories never end. Even when we think its over, it isn't. I like the way you have taken love to a higher pedestal by saying that even after death this love will still continue. It will truly become "everlasting"
Beautifully written.

[Ria Carol]

Thank you for your perspective on this

[Inject Positivity]

Ria wow!! I can't believe how beautiful and sad this is... Gosh!!! What a touching yet melancholic write... I'm amazed by your choice of words... How often we feel like this after being broken in life, we crave for love but there comes a day when we feel the love we we are waiting for will never pass... I felt just the way you said here my sweet frnd... Remember you have a worth here...

Sincerely
Dhiman

[Ria Carol]

Thank you Dhiman for your inspirational words :)..im glad you liked it

[Adroaldo Barbosa Jr.]

Sad poem and apocalyptic. I hope you like a poem mine called MY LAND OUR LAND. Similar but a little bit longer. But, same message. Like it!

[Matching Socks]

How very sad this one is.
To bid farewell to the world. Tragic.

[Ria Carol]

Definitely..thank you for reviewing

[barleygirl]

Your sophisticated write sent me to google: lugubriously! Very interesting word choice that fits the spot perfectly. Your poem is well-written, with haunting tones of love unfulfilled. I'm unsure what the first line of the last stanza means . . . "everlasting love" (I'm guessing) might mean God's love? If so, some people would not agree, those who feel suicide is a sin deserving hell & damnation. Just an observation, not a criticism. I see you are a singer & musician, which might explain why this seems to have a bit of a sing-song rhythm.

[Ria Carol]

Yes it means gods love...i don't think that though...i believe we are all god's children and that both a teenager like me and criminal have been created by god (whichever religion)...i believe that until we serve our karma good and bad and until all our unfinished business is completed we do not reach god.
But thats just me...i don't mean any offence to anybody who believes differently...every one of us has the right to have an opinion :)
Thank you for reviewing :)

[I am that I am]

This is a beautifully worded piece. It is not what we've lost which makes us suffer; it is what we want but cannot have which makes us suffer. And truthfully, all that we really want is to be relieved of want; for it is the want itself that makes us unavailable for anything else. I think many people can relate with this piece and the feeling it paints a picture of. Thanks for sharing, Ria.

[Ria Carol]

Thank you for such kind words. Im glad you can relate to it :)

[Hailey Juliet]

The flow of your words on display in this piece is exceptional. They are well arranged and deliberate. There is some beautiful phrasing in this poem. Very sad to read, but also beautiful in a way. Very nice poetry!

[Ria Carol]

Thank you very much for your review :)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

this is so sad...no other way for this poet...poets usually write away from suicide...but Plath, Sexton, Berryman, Jarrell....are examples of ones who wrote themselves into the bottom of the cone and had nowhere else to go...

you capture the despair so well in this...also what is different here is the speaker asking "why" not just "what method"---

j.

[Ria Carol]

Thank you so much for reviewing this. I really appreciate all the help and kindness