When Snow Turns to Rain

Empty chairs at Christmas time..

     

When Snow Turns to Rain

Tis the season to be Jolly. It's the season of "It's a Wonderful Life," "Miracle on 34th Street", "The Christmas Story." It is a time of warm fireplaces, and snow laying gently on pine tree branches, of looking at films of Christmas's past, a time of stories told and retold over the decades, by old familiar voices, a time to laugh at the same jokes. It is Christmas. It is family.

 

It is also a time to set one less plate on the table, a time where favorite chairs sit empty, and there are less gifts beneath the tree. A time when certain names are painfully avoided, a reminder that life never stops. People conceal the hurt, for fear of ruining the merry spirit. Hidden in the joy of watching everyone unwrapping their presents, we try to remember the children and their innocence. We bury the emptiness in the laughter of young children, not yet old enough to face the adult pain of a missing loved one.

 

It is a joyous time, yet a time to miss the scent of a father's cologne, a mother's laugh, a siblings taken for granted presence, a good friend's spirit. It is ok to be sad during these days. It is not only ok, it is human. Speak their name. Talk about them as if they were there, because they are. Find an empty room and lay down and cry, but do not stay long. Honor the life that once was. Pay them tribute with your tears, but never forget what they would say if they saw you throw away your happiness because of their leaving. You honor the missing by using their memory as a source of strength, and not a reason to mourn.

 

You owe them that tribute to their life. However hard it is, it is their life that counts, not their passing. Your turn will come, just as their's did. How would you want those who loved you to remember you ? What a tribute to have the memory of your life continue to make them smile, and give them peace, and determination. It is a season that is difficult for many, but it should always remain a season of family. The chair will never be empty...it is Christmas. 

 

Reviews

[None]

You give great insights and advice here and point out that we need to enjoy each moment we have with our loved ones now. At Christmas time, sentiments and feelings are paramount. Your suggestions are worth their weight in gold. I'm saving this to favorites. Thank you for this raw story.

[A sea person]

Thank you for submitting this to my contest!

[Amanda]

a wonderfully true story here, Ray....the last paragraph is especially true. many tend to forget that Christmas is about being together and remembering the times with family. though some may have passed, remembering them and paying tribute to them is a part of life in the grand scheme of things...they will always be with us in our hearts and in our minds.

thank you for sharing this, my friend.

A xox

[Bhavya Kaushik]

What a tribute to have the memory of your life continue to make them smile, and give them peace, and determination. It is a season that is difficult for many, but it should always remain a season of family. The chair will never be empty...it is Christmas. - Wow! What a beautiful line, I can relate myself to it so well and to such a great extend.
It is very deep and thoughtful indeed, the metaphor is the line "The chair will never be empty...." is just speaking a lot.
Christmas doesn't come with the same feel to everyone but in some or the other way, we all celebrate it in the same way, by never ever keeping the chair empty!
This is such a great piece of writing, thanks a lot for sharing it with me.
:)

[Fabian G. Franklin]

Charles Dickens wrote A Christmas Story that touched on these thoughts here but more to the point, he also wrote A Child's Dream of a Star. I have read it several times and although it is a short story, I have never made it through without tears rolling down my cheeks. This was very touching and sensitive. Bravo my friend and Merry Christmas. And if you have not read Dickens' short story, it is online and well worth the five minute read. But have your kleenex handy.

[V. K. Harris]

Beautifully written Rain, it brought a tear my friend, I miss my grandma very much along with the gathering that once was. Well done, Merry Christmas

[J.Black]

"The chair will never be empty...it is Christmas."

Hmm, this is really well said. You state what needs to be truly enjoyed, the moment we share with our family, friends and anything else we love such as our pets.

"It is a joyous time, yet a time to miss the scent of a father's cologne, a mother's laugh, a siblings taken for granted presence, a good friend's spirit. It is ok to be sad during these days. It is not only ok, it is human. Speak their name. Talk about them as if they were there, because they are. Find an empty room and lay down and cry, but do not stay long. Honor the life that once was. Pay them tribute with your tears, but never forget what they would say if they saw you throw away your happiness because of their leaving. You honor the missing by using their memory as a source of strength, and not a reason to mourn."

I loved this!

[Frank Terino]

Empowering reading. A beautiful reminder and right on time, I felt sentimental truth in every word. Timeless.

[emmajoy]

Oh Rain, that is so true!

When my birth family has gathered for Christmas Lunch - and in the UK it's as special as your Thanksgiving - whoever's hosting fills glasses with whatever, then we openly go through all the people we'd just love to have with us; we cry if we want, we hug, we go quiet.. but somehow we all manage to remember and it might be minutes before we calm, but nobody minds, nobody feels uncomfortable. That done we get on with the day; if we want to talk about sisters Sarah or Hannah, darling mum or daddy, aunts uncles, cousins, old and a few young family friends - remembering this or that saying or event he or she was known for - we do it.. but, in a way, we've diluted the pain. Then we feel they're all there laughing or chatting with us.

They're there alright. And yes, each year brings another empty chair, but then, next year, that person will be especially remembered because inside us all, he or she won't be forgotten - ever.

Sorry, this is more about me and us.. it's just that your wonderful post backs up so many people's situations at what should be a happy time. Your post is incredibly moving, heart-filling too, although sad.

Thank you so much for touching on a delicate subject so very beautifully.

[Blackbirdsong]

I think everything you say about people holding back their feelings of loss and sadness this time of year is probably the main reason why so many end up depressed. It's okay to feel the loss. Embrace it. Those people have left empty chairs and we should honor that memory. Only then I think can we move on to our own joy and create new and lasting memories. Thanks as always for the wisdom my friend.

[Dalaina Renee]

Really nice story. And every moment does count! Christmas memories are the best ones.